It was a dark and stormy day. Or was it night? John Poulos couldn't tell the difference anymore after a few months at sea in the Atlantic. He swore he'd tossed more meals than he'd eaten. That's it. Next time I join a religious movement, I'm not travelling with them.

"Weather getting to you, John?" asked one of his friends, William Congreve.

John groaned. "How much longer until we reach the New World?"

Congreve shrugged. "I do not know, hopefully It won't be much longer." He slapped John on the shoulder. "Cheer up, old chum. God will get us there safely."

John only nodded as William moved elsewhere. John tried not to move much in stormy weather. Somewhat clumsy by nature, one slip on a damp deck could be hazardous. He wanted a new life in the New World, away from the childhood peers who taunted him. At least the Puritans didn't make fun of anyone. At least he had a wife who didn't either.

As soon as the boat steadied, he made his way back to his room. His stomach growled, but he ignored it. It wouldn't be the first time he went to bed hungry on the trip, and it cut down on seasickness.

He bumped right into his wife Constance as he entered the room. "I was just coming to look for you, love," she said with a smile. "I've hardly seen you all day."

He brought her in for a kiss. "You know I'd always be back on time, dear."

"Not necessarily," she said with a smile. "You could get washed overboard. Or you'd be out partying."

"You know these men don't believe in fun," he said. "I save all my fun for you."

She giggled, and they moved to the bed while kissing.

It was a week later when John finally heard the news they'd all been waiting for: land ho. He and Constance made their way onto the deck within minutes.

"There she is, brothers, the New World," said the captain, John Smith. John Poulos couldn't believe what he saw. He was so used to the numerous buildings of England, visible as far as several miles from shore, that it was unusual to see nothing except a long strip of green grass and rocks for a shore.

"We'll be there by sundown, brothers," said Smith. "We'll have to settle for sleeping on the ship tonight. Tomorrow, we head on shore and start making a settlement."

"What about those savages we've heard about?" asked Timothy Anderson, a guy who was almost as much of an outcase as John. "I heard they come out of the forest hills and attack us with stone weapons."

"Simple. If they attack, we kill them," said Smith. "No weapon made by savages can possibly withstand those of a superior culture aided by God."

John swallowed hard, hoping the captain was right.

The next morning they disembarked from the ship, all eager for land after endless weeks on the ocean. The stronger men set about clearing the heaviest trees. John was part of the second group- sawing the trees into sections. The work lasted for most of the next few days, and a good ten acres was cleared for settlement. On the first few nights, they decided to return to the ship to sleep, before the houses were completed.

Constance and the other women had remained behind on the ship, and John went right to his chambers. He noticed Constance was pacing back and forth, but her face lightened when she saw him, and she ran to kiss him.

"Dear Lord, you smell like a beast," she said, giggling. "Wash up first."

John did so. "I can't wait, Constance. Pretty soon we will be living in our own home. No more cramped quarters, no more fish for dinner, breakfast, *and* lunch. This is going to be great!"

"I can't wait either," she said cheerfully.

When they arrived in the village a few days later, though, they found it a mess. The logs were scattered everywhere, though none seemed to be missing. "What manner of beast did this?!" demanded Smith.

"It was no beast, sir, it had to be those savages," said Anderson. He pulled up an odd contraption from the ground, which was left by one of the scattered piles. "They left this."

"Burn it," said Smith. "Their heathen practices can't scare us. Now, let's start building."

Two men at a time worked on building a house, the largest going to Smith. It took halfway into the third day to finish, but in the end they had a set of twenty crudely built houses. Smith had them cut down more trees to work on forts and fences.

John and Constance ate alone in their house that night, eating the last of the rations. The next day the others would go hunting for fresh meat.

John was concerned when Constance seemed reluctant to finish her meal. "Anything wrong, love?"

She smiled and shrugged. "I'm just not that hungry. This meat is so old I'm surprised the worms haven't found it."

John chuckled. "Now that's the old Constance. Don't worry, it'll be fresh food tomorrow."

Indeed it was. A couple of deer were killed in the hunt, so everyone had their fair share of venison. Constance attacked the food more eagerly, but didn't finish all of it.

That night John went out to go to the bathroom, and when he was finished he was startled to find an audience. A young woman with dark skin, about 20 years old, was watching him with interest.

John flushed red. "Oh, hi, um, I didn't see you. Hi."

She laughed gently. "Don't be scared," she said in halting English.

John was amazed enough to forget his embarrassment. "You speak English. Great. How did you learn it?"

"Men came two... parents ago," she said. Only young know English. Very old like to speak our tongue only."

John couldn't help being fascinated. She was an interesting woman. "My name's John. What's yours?"

"North Star," she said.

"Nice to meet you, North Star," he said, and offered his hand. She looked at it questioningly, then grasped it.

"John, what's taking you so-?" Constance stopped short when she saw North Star. "Go away! Get away from here, you savage!"

"Darling, please, she's-" John started to say.

She ignored him. "Leave this instant!"

North Star nodded and turned, but John promised under his breath that she could come again, if only to him. She smiled and left.

Constance was storming back and forth inside. "Those creatures think they can still come here whenever they want to. I'm surprised they didn't bring a whole army."

"I think she was just curious, love," John said.

"I don't care, I don't want anything to do with them," Constance said. She calmed down and went to John. "Please, for my sake, ignore them."

"I will if you're present," was all he could agree to. She looked hurt, but he didn't want to tell a lie.

A few days later, North Star invited John to visit her tribe. It was an hour's hike to the south, and at least worth the trip. John saw a large community of about 500 men, women, and children occupying it. A lack of clothing unnerved him, but he tried not to show it.

North Star took John to see her immediate family- her parents and three grandparents, three siblings, a brother-in-law, and two small children. John had never seen so many members of a family living in one house.

Through North Star, John let her father know who he was and what he was here for. He seemed as distrustful as Constance, but North Star was very good at making him keep his temper.

John had at least given the excuse that he was out scouting, so no one would know his true location. He did at least some scouting before returning.

As time went by, Constance's condition began to worsen. The lack of appetite hadn't been any real cause for alarm, since she still ate well when starting a meal, she just couldn't finish.

Things became more dire when she began to grow pale, fatigued, and weak. John had trouble getting her up in the morning.

No one knew what was wrong. It couldn't be influenza, because she was the only one who was ill. Congreve became John's emotional crutch, and advised that he just wait and see what happened.

Easier said than done. It hurt John to beg Constance to eat more, only to see her reject it. He didn't know what to do.

One morning he awoke to Constance's ragged breathing. She was clutching and unclutching the bedsheets, her back was arched, and her eyes were wide.

"Constance!" he said in alarm. He touched her forehead and found it warm. "What's hurting?"

"My abdomen," she said. "I've been having some pains for the last week, but it hasn't been this bad."

"A week?! Constance, you should have said something," he chided. He got up and started getting dressed. "Hampshire and Congreve aren't any help. I'll get someone for you."

"Where are you-?" she quickly stopped herself. "Oh no. No, not North Star. No, I won't have it. No!"

"Darling, maybe you caught something while you were here," said John. "Who would know the local illnesses better than her people?"

Constance seemed to contemplate it for several minutes. "All right, I guess they would know better. Anything to get rid of this pain."

John bit his lip and raced to the Indian village.

When he came back with North Star and her village's shamaness, he had Constance walk out to the woods so the others couldn't see them. Constance started having second thoughts, but John convinced her to lie down so the shamaness could examine her.

The shamaness went through an interesting set of motions, then settled on the abdomen. After several minutes, she said something to North Star.

"Well, what did she say?" said John nervously.

North Star had a neutral expression on her face. "It's a baby. Baby growing in wrong place."

John was taken aback. "A baby. I'm going to be a father?"

North Star shook her head. "Not this time. Baby must be killed, or mother won't survive."

John was horror-stricken. "Kill the baby? No. No, I won't have it. No, I can't lose it."

"She will die if it isn't killed," said North Star pointedly. "If we kill it in the next few days, Constance will live. Shamaness will see to it that she can still have a baby one day."

John was torn. On the one hand, the death of an unborn child seemed a grave sin against God. On the other hand, he wanted Constance to live. He knelt down beside Constance. "What do you say, Constance?"

Constance seemed equally torn. "All right, do it. But I still want to have a baby one day."

"She will try," said North Star about the shamaness.

Two days later it was over. An herbal mixture and some abdominal massaging helped abort the ectopic pregnancy. Constance, overwhelmed with pain, guilt, and regrets would not stop crying, afraid that God had turned his back on her. John passed the event off as a miscarriage to the others to evade suspicion. They already long suspected his frequent trips away, but declined to press charges until proof could be found.

Three months later, in July, John decided that the Pilgrims should make peace with North Star's tribe. He didn't want to keep them secret any longer. He invited Congreve to his house when North Star was scheduled to make a visit, claiming that Constance needed someone to talk to. Constance had become withdrawn in the last three months since the abortion, convinced that her soul was damned. Congreve, of course, didn't understand the connection. She refused to go to prayer services anymore and prayed for forgiveness constantly in private.

John purposely had Congreve answer the door when North Star came, but Congreve's reaction was unexpected. He fairly shoved the woman back outside, complete with a few indecent words.

"William, stop it!" John said.

"How dare you let that savage in here!" said Congreve. "Do you know what the captain will do if he sees her?"

"North Star isn't a savage," said John firmly.

Congreve raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you've been seeing her, haven't you? The captain will love to hear this," he said, and stormed out.

John knew he was in for it.

"You mean to say you've been seeing these savages for the last five months?!" Smith said.

"I happened upon North Star by accident, and we've become very good friends," said John calmly. "They won't attack, if that's what you are afraid of. If we don't bother them, they won't bother us."

"You make a very good argument," said Smith. "However, I cannot allow someone to introduce them into this settlement. The threat must be removed."

"What are you saying?" said John nervously.

Smith cleared his throat. "I banish you from the colony!"

John stood up quickly. "What? No! I have too many friends here to lose!"

"You should have thought of that before," said Smith. "You have until noon tomorrow to leave."

John went back to his hut, upset. He knew there'd be consequences, but he hadn't expected this. What would he and Constance do?

When he arrived home, though, a much more serious matter arose. Constance was standing on a chair with a rope tied around her neck.

"Constance! Don't do it!" John said.

"I have to," she sobbed. "My soul is damned anyway for killing our baby. Killing myself won't change my fate."

He ran to her. "Constance, don't, please. I can't lose you. We've already been banished because of my actions. I can't lose my home, my friends, and my wife all in the same day."

She hesitated.

"Please, do it for me," he said, his voice trembling.

Constance waited another minute, then slowly climbed down. She then collapsed in his arms, sobbing. "I didn't mean to do it. I didn't mean to kill it. I was selfish. God hates me now."

John rocked her back and forth as she cried herself out.

They moved in with North Star's tribe, and over the next four months they began to fit in. With other, more sensitive women to talk to, Congreve gradually gained some of her sparkle back, and was no longer in danger of committing suicide.

John came up with a plan to bring the Indians and Pilgrims together once and for all, and reestablish his place in that community. They came up plans for a nice meal for late November, because John knew that the Pilgrims had already planned a harvest dinner. Two men slaughtered a turkey, while maize and potatoes were harvested. Armed with their food, they set out for the Pilgrim's post.

John was surprised at the meager harvest dinner he saw. Apparently the crops had gone bad in the last few months. Better late than never to break the ice. "Anyone want some decent food?" he called out.

Smith turned. "Poulos! You know you're not welcome here."

"Not even when I bring food?" John asked. He saw their eyes widen at the sight of fresh cooked turkey, potatoes, and corn.

Smith sighed. "All right. One meal as long as you have food."

"What about a few guests?" said John, showing the tribe.

"Oh no, I draw the line. No savages," said Smith.

"I'm only asking for one meal," said John.

Eventually Smith did let North Star's tribe stay for dinner, and John went about getting reacquainted with everyone. He and Constance were allowed back in the community six months later.

Please take the time to write to trfan at zimamcfru@hotmail.com, and let her know how you liked the story!

COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER:
Xena: Warrior Princess, Joxer, and all other characters who have appeared in the series, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of StudiosUSA and Renaissance Pictures. No infringement of copyrights or trademarks is intended in the writing of this fan fiction. The characters appearing in this story are the property of the author and were created for use in this fiction, but were inspired by the characters in Xena: Warrior Princess. This story is copyright © 2000 by trfan and is her sole property along with the story idea. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.