Rated: PG
Summary: Judd, Joxer's father, makes trouble for the happy couple during their honeymoon.
Timeline: takes place about a month after the wedding in "My Cup Runneth Over".

"Well boy, I'm out of here. My ten-year sentence is over and I'm as free as a bird!"

Jett stared at his father through the bars of his jail cell. "Father, leave Jox alone! He's happy now!"

"Leave him alone? Are you insane? The little dork finally got married and I've got to meet the fool that married him," Judd laughed harshly.

Jett stood up, reached through the bars and grabbed his father. "Now you listen to me! Joxer's happy! Gabrielle's the best thing that's ever happened to him, and if you ruin it for him I will personally kill you," he swore.

Judd grabbed his son's hands. "Let go of me now boy, or I promise that you'll regret it!"

Jett growled at his father and then released him. "Please, just let Joxer alone."

"I won't do anything to hurt the dork now that he's married."

"Father, please!"

"I said I won't, and I won't. Warlord's honor," Judd said.

"Yeah, like you know anything about honor," Jett growled.

Judd smiled and walked away, leaving Jett wondering what in Tartarus his father was up to.

Two weeks later, Joxer and Gabrielle arrived in a small village. Gabrielle counted their money carefully. "Joxer, this money has to last us a week. We really shouldn't have spent so much money shopping with Jace and Arose."

"Well, Jace just wasn't going to let us leave without new clothes," Joxer said.

"That's true," Gabrielle smiled and looked over at her husband dressed nicely in a simple tunic and pants. "Like I was saying, this money has to last a week, so find a room but a cheap one, okay? We need to eat and board Sugar too, so I'll look for a stable that's decent and cheap." She leaned over and gave him a kiss that he returned eagerly.

Joxer nodded when the kiss broke, took the money from Gabrielle and headed over to an inn near the village center to see about a room. When he walked in, everyone smiled at him. Joxer smiled back, wondering why anybody was bothering with him. The innkeeper rushed over to him, grabbing his hand and shaking it hard. "You must be Joxer the Mighty! Welcome! Welcome to my inn. It's a great honor to have you here!"

Joxer was puzzled, but recovered quickly. "Uh, thanks. I need a room for two and something to eat," he said.

"Yes, of course you do! The best room in the house," the innkeeper said.

"I can't afford the best room in the house. We're a little short on dinars," Joxer admitted.

"Money? Did I even mention money? Everything's on me! The room, the food, everything!"

Joxer stared at the innkeeper, his eyebrows furrowing together. "Now, wait a minute! Why are you giving everything free to me?"

The innkeeper was told what to say just in case Joxer asked. "Ah... Well, it's not really free. The money was sent to me with a note telling me you were coming as wedding gift."

"Oh. From who?"

"Don't know. The note wasn't signed."

"I bet it was Xena..." Joxer replied to the innkeeper, a smile lighting his features, not even thinking that Xena couldn't afford to pay for such a thing.

"Yes, I'll bet it was Xena too." The innkeeper climbed on a chair. "Everyone, listen to me! We have an honored guest here, Joxer the Mighty! Please sing his praises with me." Everyone stopped whatever they were doing, stood up, and sang very loudly and off-key Joxer's song to his complete amazement.

Gabrielle walked in just in time to hear the singing. "What is going on?" she asked.

Joxer looked at Gabrielle with what seemed to be pride, but his eyes were filled with mischief. "I found the place I want to live," he said.

Gabrielle stood next to Joxer with her mouth hanging open and watched the people in the tavern singing, completely missing the teasing note in her husband's voice.

"Gabrielle, look around you! They love me here! Listen, they're singing my song," Joxer beamed as he waved his arms at the crowd then looked at Gabrielle to see if she was catching on.

"Yeah. I noticed," replied Gabrielle, holding her hands against her ears. "If you want to call that singing," she said dubiously.

"I think it's nice. I think I'll join them," he said, eyes twinkling.

"What? Fine, Joxer! You go ahead and join them. I don't mind. I'll just sit here and wait," she said as she sat down.

"Thanks, Gabrielle! I won't be long," Joxer smiled. He wondered how long he should keep this up, but right now he was enjoying it.

Gabrielle stood up and snapped at him, "Joxer! I was being sarcastic!" She reached up and grabbed him by the earlobe. "Let's get out of here."

"OW! OW! OW! Gabrielle, you promised not to do that any more!" he whimpered.

"Then let's see about a room and go upstairs," Gabrielle said.

Joxer rubbed his ear and winced at the pain he felt coming from where Gabrielle had grabbed him. "We already have a room and dinner coming," he said.

"How much is the room and dinner going to cost us?" Gabrielle asked suspiciously.

"Nothing! Someone already paid for it. It's a wedding gift," Joxer replied.

Gabrielle rolled her eyes. "From who?"

"I don't know. The innkeeper said someone sent a note and told him to give us the best in the place. It's right at the top of the stairs," Joxer said. "I think it might have been Xena. Besides, the villagers are happy to see me."

"Joxer, there's no way Xena could afford this place! I'm going to bed. You can stay down here with your followers," Gabrielle sighed and started to walk upstairs.

"Gabrielle, don't be that way. They love me!" Joxer protested.

"I love you too Joxer, but I'm not sharing you with a whole village, so it's either them or me."

Joxer looked at all the people singing his song then back at Gabrielle. "Oh, it's no contest."

Gabrielle smiled. "Good, then let's go."

Joxer wasn't quite ready to stop teasing yet even though there was a little voice in the back of his head saying, DON'T! He just couldn't resist saying, "I'm staying here."

"What? Oh, fine! You stay here then," Gabrielle walked away in a huff, heading upstairs. Joxer ran after her, realizing then that the joke had gone a little too far.

"Gabrielle! Gabrielle! I was just joking, honey!" Gabrielle headed into the room and slammed the door in Joxer's face, locking it behind her. "Come on, Gabrielle. Let me in! I was kidding you, honest!" He banged his fist against the door in frustration.

"No, go away, Joxer! Go down and sing your stupid song with those drunks," Gabrielle's voice was muffled behind the door.

"My song isn't stupid and they're not drunk!" Joxer was beginning to get angry now.

Gabrielle opened the door and threw her boot at him. "Go away, Joxer!"

Joxer backed up a couple of paces to avoid getting hit, but Gabrielle was quicker than him. When the boot hit Joxer on the forehead, he lost his balance and tumbled down the stairs. Gabrielle ran out, picked up her boot, re-entered the room and slammed the door. Joxer got up and brushed himself off. A young woman ran over to see if he was all right. "Here, let me help you up! Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks," Joxer muttered, completely embarrassed.

"Joxer, come and join us in your song," the woman said.

Joxer stared up at the stairs, his pride now hurt. He hollered up to his wife, " Fine, you want me to sing with them, fine! " He then turned back to the girl. "Thanks, I think I will." Joxer walked over and began singing his song with the others.

Gabrielle listened at the door, hoping that Joxer would come back up but he didn't. She felt so unhappy. What had gone wrong? Gabrielle knew she was short-tempered but that was uncalled for. Joxer was excited and she really didn't blame him for that. The villagers liked him and didn't think he was a dork, but why? What was going on here? For the first time since they had been married, she and Joxer were not together and she had something important to tell him. They were going to be parents. She had felt sick in town, so she had gone to see a healer and was told she was going to have a baby. They had conceived on that night in the Amazon village. She had planned a quiet romantic time alone to tell him. Now she was here and he was downstairs. Gabrielle threw herself down on the bed and wept bitterly.

A lone figure, wearing a hooded cloak so that he couldn't be seen, sat in a shadowy corner of the inn, watching Joxer and the other people having fun as Joxer began teaching them another verse of his song. "Joxer, by the time I'm done, Gabrielle will hate the very mention of your name," Judd smiled as he paid the innkeeper with a sack filled with dinars. "Make sure everyone gets their share. I want Gabrielle out of his life by the end of this week," he whispered. Judd looked at the innkeeper as he set down a mug of ale in front of him and lifted the mug up. "Here, join me in a toast: to the happy couple. May their lives be completely miserable by the end of the week!"

Conclusion >>>