Copyright 1999
(to be sung by Joxer, Autolycus and a chorus of anyone handy; can also be sung solo)
(moderately, in 2)
Autolycus:
It takes a woman
Who's not into gowns
To fight off the warlord
And rescue the town,
Joxer:
And it takes an angel
who swings a mean Gabstaff
To guard all the children
And flatten the riff-raff!
All:
Yes, it takes a woman,
A fighting woman,
A Xena or a Gabrielle.
Oh, yes, it takes a woman,
A warrior woman,
To make everything turn out swell!
Joxer:
That sweet young Gabby
Who carries a sai,
Will beat bullies up and
Cut them down to size.
Autolycus:
And it takes a Xena
Who carries a chakram
To stand up to armies
And scare off the Persians.
All:
Yes, it takes a woman,
A fighting woman,
A Xena or a Gabrielle.
Oh, yes, it takes a woman,
A warrior woman,
To make everything turn out swell!
(slower; instant glee club)
Their lines are bound throughout infinity;
Each lifetime they'll fight Alti!
(shouted, as cheerleaders)
X-E-N-A!
G-A-B-
R-I-E-
L-L-E!
Xena: (spoken:) Knock it off!
(Gabrielle tweaks Joxer's nose.)
Joxer: OW!
Autolycus (a tempo):
And girls like Minya
Who crack a long whip
Will keep all the bad guys
From giving the slip.
Joxer:
And it takes a woman
Who's proud and who's so strong
To live in the forest
As an Amazon!
Both:
To those mighty women,
Those Amazon women,
Like Ephiny and Amarice.
Oh, yes, it takes a woman,
Autolycus:
A leather-clad woman,
Both:
To wage war in the name of peace!
All:
Oh, yes, it takes a woman,
A fighting woman,
A Xena or a Gabrielle.
Oh, yes, it takes a woman,
A warrior woman,
To make everything turn out swell!