by Kawcrow

Copyright 2000

Gabrielle and Xena were
The best of friends
All through their warrior days
Both friendly with the Amazons
Both active in SPCA
To defend the Trojans
Xena soon went out
Lookin' for a hopeful word
Gabby looked all around this fort
And all she found was Perd

Well, it wasn't twelve hours
After they got married
That Perdy got some Calli abuse
Gab put on tight clothing
Wrote long sad stories
And set out, that blondie to bruise
Well, she finally got the brains
To put down her sword
She let Xena take it from there
Xena walked up to
That psychotic Barbie and
Put her in intensive care

Then Joxer the Mighty
Hurried in from Athens
So worried on his midnight flight
He held Gabby's hand--
Cause the writers formed a plan!
And it hadn't taken
Long to decide
That Perd had to die!

(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Goodbye, Perd!
Those pointy swords, Perd
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
They'll sever your spinal cord, Perd
You feelin' weak?
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Why don't you lay down and sleep, Perd
Your fate's sealed!
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Have fun in the Fields, Perd

They sent Call by
To do Perd in
With one thrust she
Brought him low
Then she tipped her sword
And said 'see ya, Gabby'
'You wanna join him, let me know'
Well, the eps went by
And spring turned to summer
And summer faded into fall
And it turns out he
Was a missing redshirt
Who nobody missed at all

So Gabby got a tan
And a Joxer man
And adjusted quite all right
She's got skill with the sais,
And marvelous thighs,
And she doesn't
Lose her sleep at night
'Cause Perd had to die!

(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Goodnight, Perd
Give us a break!
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
You're more than we can take, Perd--
So Mary Sue!
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Don't write us; adieu, Perd
Well, is that alright?
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Good, let's go for a ride, Perd!
Hey, well hey, hey, hey
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Aw, hey, hey, hey
(Nah nah nah nah nah!)
Well, hey, hey, hey!