Ares was really hacked off this time; Hercules had called him out to one of his Temples, whilst tearing it to the ground, just to jump into a parallel universe and make everything as icky there as they were here. Well, two could play at that game - he channelled all his power into his rolled-up hands, his fists glowing and sizzling with pent-up energy, then he let it fly in a single shot towards the skies, the sky rumbling as the energy flew towards it. It wasn1t as powerful as one of Zeus' lightning bolts, but the amount of power and concentration he put into that one shot should do the trick.

Ares watched it reach its target impatiently, then was blown backwards by a rebounding force fired back at him, as the heavens opened to reveal a maelstrom. The Wargod flew backwards into a large tree, then shook himself free and ran towards the airway. "Alright!! Wait 'til they get a load of me!" he guffawed as he was sucked in to the other universe...

He landed with a thump on the ground, then picked himself up with a flip and scanned the area for any other deities nearby. He made a face as he sensed just the one, but it was - Yeuch! - Lurrrrrve! Aphrodite! Great, his airhead of a sister, just who he wanted to see least of all! He teleported up to the Halls of War and ran straight into Cupid, lounging in his Throne!

Ares growled at the God opposite him. "Go play with your mother Cupid - leave the Halls of War for the Gods, not mere Godlings!"

"Godling, am I?" Cupid roared and let loose a couple of fireballs. Ares ducked and fired a lightning bolt, pinning Cupid to the Throne.

"Right, 'Wing-boy', let's get a couple of things clear, shall we?" Ares said casually, as he joined Cupid in a flash before he could recover, lifting him up from the Throne and holding him firmly in his grasp, before flinging him across the Chamber. "I don't know what you Gods do for fun around here, but I'm the God of War, and I don't like Godlings of Love sitting in my Throne! Now go and shoot some mortals with your love arrows!" he said dismissively.

Cupid was really pissed when he rematerialized by the throne, grabbing Ares and making his voice several octaves higher, "Now Ares, I'll talk, you listen - These are My Halls of War, not for squatters! Now beat it!"

The two Gods eyed each other warily, both raised hands to launch a fireball at the other, when Ares God of Love appeared by their side. "Cupie, shame about the Sovereign, but when you gotta go, you gotta go! Looks like my boy wins again!" he chuckled. "Guess that means he's not going to be your prize warrior any time again soon!"

Both Gods of War turned to scowl at Ares and he jumped when he saw his mirror image in black. "Hey, you're me! - I mean, you - I mean -" he paused, looking at his double thoughtfully. "Hmm, I don't know, is leather me? And that beard just doesn't work," he said, stroking his smooth chin.

He turned to leave, then patted his trim stomach. "You might want to think about losing some weight soon," he said, then yelped as Ares and Cupid nodded at each other and fired their fireballs at him, disappearing in a shower of coloured petals before they hit him.

"So, you're a God of War too, huh?" Cupid said evenly. "So what are you doing here?"

"Oh, just a stranger passing through, you might say," Ares said airily, "so tell me who's who in Olympus and with the Mortals around here."

"Why do you want to know?" Cupid demanded, his eyes narrowed in suspicion at the other God's motives.

"Mutual benefit," Ares said easily, not fazed by the other's hostility, "I help you in your universe and you help me in mine."

"What's in it for me?" Cupid asked, his hostility lessened, but still suspicious of his fellow War God.

"War! Or to be more exact, we get rid of who stops war and battles!" Ares said triumphantly.

"Kewl!" Cupid said with a broad grin. "So what's the plan?"

"We both have our best ever Warrior converted to against us, right?" queried Ares.

"Stops all my best plans, invasions, fights, the lot," Cupid agreed. "So?"

"We just work a little switcheroo - swap the most inept warrior in my Universe for your adversary, and you swap me the most inept fighter in your Universe for my 'problem'," Ares suggested.

"Yeah, that could work," Cupid said thoughtfully, "Who's your two?"

"Xena - Warrior Princess and Joxer the Duke of Dork," answered Ares, "and yours?"

"Now there's a coincidence," Cupid said with a twinkle in his eyes, "Joxer the Rebel and Xena the Tramp!"

After successfully defeating The Sovereign and his allies with Hercules' help, Joxer set about re-organising provisions and supplies for the people for so long downtrodden and mistreated. The Castellan and his lackeys were somewhat reluctant to hand over the food and supplies, until they were persuaded at the point of a sword to give them up. Given his dark past, Joxer was a somewhat reluctant leader, but it had been forced upon him by the arrival of the Sovereign, who'd deposed the King and imposed himself as leader.

He initially suspected it was a ploy by Cupid to bring his dark side out again, but with the Hinds blood on a ready supply from that damned Xena woman, the Gods had given the Sovereign a wide berth, so they had no reason to exactly love the Sovereign.

The Executioner was currently in chains in the dungeon - he still shivered when he thought of the power she'd became - an unguided missile at any and all in her way - though he wasn't even aware she was female until she'd been uncloaked by the Jester lookalike. Her axe had been destroyed, likewise her cloak, but those probably weren't the site of her power. She was some kind of demon, he guessed, to install fear amongst the villagers and any potential troublemakers, though where the Sovereign had picked her up from, smelt of a deal with Cupid. Xena was still fighting with Aphrodite when he last saw her, though more recent reports said she'd escaped through a secret tunnel and into the forest nearby.

As little as he trusted and liked the Gods, at least they were better than the Sovereign - though they hadn't exactly been overwhelming in help after the other Iolaus had grabbed the phial of Hinds blood from Xena, apart from Athena, who'd provided some tools and farming equipment from her mighty Forge, and Artemis who'd given them a fine harvest in the fields. What they needed now was a leader to rule the Kingdom; there was no way in Tartarus he'd do it, he knew that would only give Cupid the excuse he needed to start a war, not that he needed an excuse -

His train of thought was interrupted by Ares, God of Love appearing by his side. "Why can't people just get along?" he sighed, looking at the chaotic remnants of the castle and various prisoners being escorted to the dungeon.

"Ares!" Joxer said in relief, "I thought it might be Cupid trying to tempt me with the Crown again - the Gods know he's tried enough times where he can manipulate me for his own purposes!"

"Joxer, Cupie's up to mischief again - he's brought another God in from outside - " Ares explained.

"He's what! But he can't do that!" Joxer protested.

"Can and has, Jox. He's another Wargod and he's my twin - well, apart from I've got better hair and I wear more chic clothes," Ares said with a small smile.

"So how will I know you apart?" Joxer demanded to know.

"Relax Jox, it's all in the bag - you know my niece Discord, of course," Ares continued as she appeared by his side in a golden shower of light, with her arm around Joxer.

"Discord," Joxer said happily, glad to see his paramour again, kissing her on the forehead and hugging her tightly.

"Hiya Jox, how ya doing?" she said cheerily, her bright smile lighting up the room. "What's up Unc?"

Ares rolled his eyes at his niece; charming though she was, she was still as brash as ever and hadn't learnt the finer points of being a junior Goddess yet. "Discord, can you keep an eye on Jox for me while this other War God's around? Cupid's bad enough, but this other War God could be real trouble," he said seriously.

"Sure Unc, no probs!" Discord promised with a winning smile.

"But how will I know you and the other Ares apart?" Joxer persisted

"Oh relax Babe, Unc'll just do the Love thing!" Discord said dismissively. "Come on Jox, I want to see your Castle!"

Ares watched them go and sadly shook his head. Though he had a soft spot for Joxer, he wasn't over happy about a mortal and his niece being mixed up together, least of all a mortal with his chequered past; still, it'd sort itself out sooner or later and they'd realize it just couldn't work out between a mortal and a Goddess. But he wouldn't interfere - this was a matter entirely for the two of them.

Ares was back in his own universe and was about to put the first part of the plan in action, as he watched Joxer, Xena and Gabrielle pack up camp and preparing for the walk to the next village. Joxer was collecting some nuts and berries from the trees and bushes in the nearby thicket, Gabrielle was packing her cooking equipment into Argo's saddlebags, and Xena was brushing Argo down, after watering her at the stream, when she stiffened, sensing the presence of an old adversary.

"Joxer, we're ready now - are you coming?" Gabrielle called to Joxer.

"Okay Gabby, can you give me a hand?" he called back. Gabrielle sighed and went over to him, seeing his heavily laden basket balancing precariously on the branches where Joxer was sitting. "Joxer, you filled it too full again - take some out and come on!" she said impatiently.

"Ares! Where are you? I know you're here!" Xena called out angrily. The last thing she need before a long day's walking was Ares making her life a living Tartarus.

"Oh Gabrielle, Gabrielle, such anger! Tsk, tsk!" Ares scolded her, as he appeared before her. "Why don't you sleep it off?" and he hit her with a lightning bolt, sending her flying backwards into the berry bushes, where she landed with a thump, out cold.

Xena started when she saw her best friend flung past her and ran towards her, checking for damage, but there were no broken bones, just a slight bruising when she'd landed on her side. She drew her sword, but before she'd ran five yards, Joxer had already reached him with his beaten-up old sword. "Gabby!" he shouted in a fury, "you hurt Gabby!"

"Oh you mortals are so predictable," Ares said in a bored voice, shaking his head, and swatting Joxer's sword aside with no trouble at all, he sent a concentrated lightning bolt upwards. The portal opened and Joxer was sucked into it, only his scream of terror could be heard as he vanished from the planet.

"So long, idiot," he called after him, vanishing and rematerializing a safe distance away from the whirling maelstrom. He turned around to see the furious figure of the Warrior Princess facing him, her sword brandished and pointing at his throat: "So, Ares, any last requests before I cut you into very thin slices?" she said in a voice that didn't brook argument.

"Just one," Ares said calmly, "are you going to rescue him or not?"

"So where have you sent him Ares?" Xena demanded.

"Not far away, but you'll have to hurry - the portal doesn't stay open very long," Ares urged her.

"What about Gabrielle - can she come with me?" Xena asked.

"Nope, just you or-no-one, Xena," the War God replied

"Then I'm not going. I'm damned if I'm going to be one of your pawns in your crooked games," Xena said finally.

"Well, when Blondie wakes up, you tell her you left your friend to die. Should be - ooohh, any time now," Ares said with an evil grin, looking at a sandglass, with the sands rapidly diminishing into the lower half. "She'll forgive you - probably - and you'll get over the guilt - just like you did over Callisto! Gotta go - evil plans don't just make themselves you know!"

Just as he made to vanish, Xena caught his shoulder and was rewarded by a smug look. "Alright Ares, what do I have to do?" she said in a resigned tone.

"Just jump through into the portal and it'll take you where he went," he explained.

"I'm not leaving Gabrielle in the open like this, nor Argo," she stated flatly.

"Fine, I'll put them both in the Inn in that village a mile back," Ares agreed.

"If they're harmed....." Xena left the sentence unfinished with an unstated threat of revenge.

"So trusting, aren't you Xena?" Ares sneered. "I give my word as God of War I will not send any God, anyone or anything after them. Happy now?"

"Hmmm," mused Xena, looking for an escape clause in what the God of War had just said, but finding nothing. "Xeeeeeeennnnnnaaaaa!" she cried her warcry as she flew forward and upwards towards the portal and disappeared in pursuit of her friend.

Ares smiled to himself as he watched the warrior princess vanish into the alternate Greece. "You should always study the smallprint Xena - I said I wouldn't send anyone after the irritating blonde and the horse, I never said anyone else couldn't, and I'll be making sure she's a target!"

He lifted Gabrielle onto Argo's back and transported all three of them to the inn in the nearby village - Argo was installed in the stable and Gabrielle was laid out on a bed, a large black cloak draped over her, and a poleaxe standing in the corner behind the door.

From what Cupid had told him of the Executioner and Joxer the Rebel, there wouldn't be any love lost between the two and Joxer wouldn't waste any time in trying to dispatch her for good, if he thought the Executioner was loose again to create havoc and death. And he'd make sure Joxer found her before she woke up, now there was a fight to savour!

He grinned at the prospect of the two of them fighting to the death - whoever won, he couldn't lose; if Gabrielle killed him, she'd be so distraught at killing one of her best friends, she'd be no good at curbing Xena when she got the red mists in battle; and if Joxer killed her, Xena, whenever she got back, would be so full of hate and revenge, he, Ares, God of War, would be able to manipulate her again and she'd be his before she knew it.

Of course, that all depended on Xena returning from the other universe, but he had every belief that she'd return somehow, if only to not give him the satisfaction of his plan succeeding!

It was almost a kind of ritual; him thinking of a plan to start a war and her coming up with a ploy to stop it.

But if she didn't make it back? Well, he'd miss the challenge of her up against him, but he'd manage without her somehow - there was always his half-brother to go up against, if he felt like a challenge. Well, he'd done his end of the bargain, now to see if Cupid held his end up......

"Where is that wildcat?" Cupid wondered, trying to focus in on her hiding place within the forest, from within the Halls of War.

She did have her uses, but he didn't have any qualms about sending her to the other Greece forever. She was a bit clingy for his tastes and tended to pay just a smidge more attention to him more than he liked.

"Xena, there you are," he said calmly, appearing before her hiding place. He looked at her with a mild glance of contempt, as she emerged from behind the tree, changing it to a look of delight, as soon as she was looking at him.

"Cupid!" she growled with passion, and made towards him.

"No time for that now Xena!" Cupid said hurriedly, holding a hand up in front of her. "I need you for a vital part of my plan to get rid of Joxer once and for all."

"Whatcha got in mind Cupid?" she asked eagerly.

"You distract Discord so I can deal with Joxer," Cupid explained, "but we need to wait until they're outside the castle."

"They're here!" she exclaimed as he saw Joxer, Discord and all the fit villagers emerged from the Castle, giving a big thumbs up to Cupid and a cackle as she vanished into the undergrowth.

The group from the Castle proceeded on the road to the village, to see what state the village and the stores were in; how much water was left in the wells, the state of the farms, what houses need to be rebuilt, how many carpenters were needed, what grain and bread was left, were there any herds of goats and flocks of sheep still around - the potential problems were numerous, but Joxer organised the various villagers to separate tasks and the surrounding area hummed with activity.

Every man and woman that was fit for work, put themselves to rebuilding the village and the ravaged countryside; Joxer and his friends that had rebelled against the Sovereign, co-ordinated the work, and the messages and reports flowed to and fro, until work halted mid-afternoon for some freshly-cooked bread from the bakery, fruit, nuts and honey from the Castle. Glad of the break after a hard day's slog, the villagers relaxed for a while and regarded the results of their hard work with satisfaction.

Joxer and Discord went for a walk together, glad of the time alone away from the hustle and bustle of the Castle and the village. "Jox, what are you going to do now that the Sovereign's gone?" Discord asked him, her head laid on his shoulder, as they stood together, watching the forest stream bubbling by.

Joxer hugged her close to him and sighed. "I don't know, Discord. If I stay here, Cupid will find some way of persuading the people to make me King. And you know what that will mean," he said pointedly.

"Maybe I should leave and try and strike out on my own, see if I can make it without hurting anyone,2 he suggested, not expecting an answer. He shrugged diffidently, thinking of what might and what could be. She looked deep into his soulful eyes, concern written all over her face, then started suddenly. He caught her as she half-pulled away. "What is it Discord?" he asked her in surprise.

"Your eyes.." she said hesitantly, "Something I saw in your eyes - for a moment they looked so cold and heartless."

He nodded in understanding. "My past, I guess, coming to haunt me with all the bad memories," he explained. "If I was to become what I was before...." He said, shuddering at the thought of it.

Their thoughts were interrupted by Cupid appearing before them. "My, isn't this sweet? The Goddess of Love and the Black Prince - now there's a combination to savour!" he laughed horribly. "Now don't tell me you were planning on leaving without saying goodbye?" he said, sounding disappointed and looking hurt.

"Cupid, what do you want?" Joxer snarled. "We have nothing to talk about anymore, the past is the past, and that's where it's staying!"

"Really? Maybe not..." The War God hinted darkly.

Suddenly Xena leapt out of the trees, straight at Discord, bundling them both down the slope towards the brook. The two of them scrambled together in a heap of bodies, culminating in a splash as they landed in the water. They exchanged blows and grappled for a hold on each other, until Xena hit her head on a rock and loosened her grip on her opponent.

"Thanks for the diversion Xena," he called to his ally and he lifted his hand to the skies, firing a pent-up bolt of energy skywards, opening the portal to the other Greece. There was no rebound from the opening this time, due to the fact it was being opened by both War Gods at the same time, albeit in different universes.

"What in Tartarus is that?" Joxer demanded to know, his voice raised to a shout to be heard above the swirling winds of the portal.

"Ever wanted to know what you'd have turned out like if you hadn't hooked up with me?" Cupid asked Joxer rhetorically. "Well, you're about to find out!" and the God of War fired a small lightning bolt at Joxer, sending him flying towards and through the portal.

"Joxer!" Discord shouted in horror, scrambling to her feet in the bed of the stream. "You bring him right back right now, or-or-or..." she said fuming, desperately trying to think of a way to think of a way to make Cupid bring Joxer back.

"Or what?" the God of War said smugly.

"Or I'll make Xena fall in love with you," she said triumphantly, her arms bent on her hips.

"Ahhh, thank you for reminding me Discord," Cupid said calmly and fired another small lightning bolt, this time at Xena, catapulting her through the portal. The look of shock and betrayal on Xena's face was clear for all to see before she entered the portal and disappeared.

"Sorry Xena, but a deal's a deal," said Cupid, completely unmoved by the screams from Xena and the look of utter disbelief from Discord. "Now, where were we? Oh yes, you were about to tell me why I was going to have to get Joxer here....?"

"You just can't trust anyone these days," Ares said sadly, as he materialized by his niece. "Where's the love, Cupid? You gotta have a little love in this world."

"Love, huh?" Cupid said thoughtfully, as he considered the idea. "Hmmm - Naah! Don't need it!"

"Everyone needs a little love, Cupid, and Discord and I are going to bring a little love into your life," Ares said with a comforting smile.

"Really?" said the War God, looking with deep suspicion at his brother

"We're going turn every warrior and fighter into lovers - isn't that great?" Ares said enthusiastically, draping his arm round Cupid's shoulder.

"Just think, no more wars or battles, just love!" Discord chipped in.

Cupid's expression was as black as his leather and wings. "So, this is the way it1s going to be is it?" Cupid said testily. "Blackmail - either I get Joxer back here or you put me out of business. Nice touch Ares - I like the way your mind's working!" and he chuckled, despite himself.

"Well?" pressed Discord, tapping her foot impatiently

"Awww, is the Love Goddess missing her mortal?" Cupid teased her.

"Say goodbye War, hello Love, Cupid!" and Ares threw a shower of love over his brother for good measure.

Cupid coughed and sneezed violently, throwing his arms about wildly to free himself of the petals and scent. "Yeuchh! Ease up on the love thing Bro, unless you want a fireball! Sheesh, you Love Gods have no sense of humour!

"He'll be here any moment now," he conceded, gesturing towards the portal.

Ares and Discord both sniffed the air, then draped their arms round his waist. "Mmm-mm! Can you smell that? There's a lot of Love in this world!" said Ares with a broad smile.

Cupid glared at them both, then brushed them off. "I'm outta here! You may have won the battle, but not the war!" and he disappeared in a cloud of red sparkles.

"Discord, you look after Jox and get him back to the Castle," said Ares. "I'm out to spread the Lurve!" and he vanished in a colourful shower of petals and hearts.

Joxer landed barely a minute later, his metal armour clattering on his clumsy landing, his arms and legs splayed in every direction, while in the other Greece, the alternate Joxer landed nimbly, quickly scanning the open country for danger..............................

...More coming soon!

Please take a moment to write to Jerry at studmuffin_jer@yahoo.com and let him know how you like the story so far!

COPYRIGHT NOTICE:
Xena: Warrior Princess, Hercules: The Legendary Journeys, Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, Ares, and all other characters who have appeared in the series, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of StudiosUSA and Renaissance Pictures. No infringement of copyrights or trademarks is intended in the writing of this fan fiction. This story is copyright © 1999 by Jerry Hendy and is his sole property along with the story idea. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.