"So this is the Underworld, huh?" Joxer said to Charon.

"Got it in one, not much to look at, is it?" the Ferryman answered him. "Gold coin please."

"I always knew this sword was good for something," Joxer muttered, shattering the hilt against the cavern floor, and a gold coin rolled out onto the edge of the wharf.

Charon's grasping hand reached out to take the fare, only to have his hand stamped on by a female foot.

"Hey! That's mine!" Charon protested.

"Oh chill out, Charon, I'm taking him up to see your Boss," a female voice countered. "My card," and she giggled, the cavern lighting up in a gloriana of bright colours.

"Olympian Express? Oh, very funny Aphrodite," the boatman said humourlessly. "Ha. Ha. Ha."

"Ex-squeeze me? You're supposed to say 'that'll do nicely' and run along, or row along, or whatever it is you do," the Love Goddess said with a pout.

"Fine, I'll remember next time," Charon said with heavy irony. "Now do I get my fare or not?"

"But of course!" 'Dite said with a radiant smile, and stretched out an arm with the coin within her dainty hand.

"Great!" said the Ferryman with a bony smile, and reached for the coin, only for it to turn into a bunch of flowers, and suddenly he was alone on the shore, Aphrodite having vanished with Joxer. "See if I care, I do this job day in, day out, never a word of thanks, all I ask for is a fare and now everyone's a comedian," he muttered to himself as he rowed back to the other shore.

"Yoo-hoo, Hades!" the Goddess hailed him cheerily as she re-appeared in her uncle's castle with Joxer by her side.

"Aphrodite, what can I do for you?" The God of the Dead welcomed her patiently.

"Well, you could try cheering this place up for a start!" 'Dite commented with a curl of her lip. "I mean, Yeuch! It's just so - dreary!"

"Thanks for the advice on the interior design, Aphrodite, but I really don't have time on my hands to brush up on my painting skills," Hades continued dryly. "Now what can I do for you?"

"Oh, I just want you to give studmuffin here back his life," Aphrodite said breezily.

The Underworld God smiled regretfully at his niece. "Sorry Aphrodite, but I can't do that. He died and he's due to go to the Elysian Fields." "When you eventually let Charon have his fare," he added.

"Oh come on Hades, you can do anything down here - this is your pad, remember? And you run it so well" she said, flattering him fulsomely.

"Nice try, Aphrodite, but I know my job and I don't shirk it, unlike some Goddesses I could mention," he said meaningfully, looking straight at the Love Goddess.

"Moi? Ooh, I'll have you know I'm the most hard-working, bodacious, dedicated Love Goddess there is!" she said, stamping her foot in annoyance and pouting.

Despite himself, he chuckled at her in amusement. "I've made my decision and that's it, I'm afraid."

Another presence announced itself and Cupid arrived. "Hey, Hades, how's it goin'? What's with not letting Joxer go back?"

"Great, now we've got the whole of Olympus coming down here," he muttered to himself. "Cupid, Aphrodite, No! He's not going back"

"Don't I get a say in all this?" Joxer volunteered.

"No!!!" the trio of deities chorused.

"So why were Gabrielle and Xena different? They've both died twice and they're still alive up there," Cupid pointed out.

"In the first place, Gabrielle isn't one of mine," Hades said, gritting his teeth and strumming his fingers impatiently, and secondly, "Xena's different."

"Oh? How?" Aphrodite asked, her arms bent on her hips and looking defiant.

"She - just is," The God ended firmly.

"So Xena just is - different -" Aphrodite said slowly, dripping acid on every word. "And Joxer isn't - different." "Well, there you have it Cupie," she said conspiratorially, "if a Mortal dies and they're not 'different', they don't get to be alive again."

"Fine! That's just fine!" Hades exploded in a temper, the Castle trembling to his wrath. "Here! Take your Mortal back!"

"Thanks Hades, you're a sweetie!" the Love Goddess smiled triumphantly, blowing him a kiss and the Godling and Goddess vanished in a shower of petals and sparkles with their prize.

"And don't hurry back!" Hades called after them. On top of everything else, they'd given him a headache and Persephone wasn't due to join him for another two months. He held his head in his hands and wondered why he'd drawn the short straw of receiving a visit from his niece's family on a mission.

The journey back to Amphipolis was a desolate and lonely one, with the Warrior Princess and the Bard alone with their thoughts, as they travelled slowly, neither in the mood for talking.

Xena reflected on his life, what he'd meant to them, how he'd affected their lives, how he was always cheerful and tried to look on the brightside, despite everything. She'd miss him terribly, but she found it difficult to express emotion; having been exposed to so much death, destruction and personal pain, she'd become numb to it all. Maybe it was time she tried, she mused. Perhaps his funeral would bring it out of her.

She looked at her friend, inconsolable in her grief, and wondered what she was going through. She couldn't even begin to imagine what it was like to love someone and not know it, and now she was finally finding out, too late.

Gabrielle was in a turmoil of emotions as they finally approached Amphipolis after nearly 3 days travel. It was lucky that the horses had been sheltered from the maelstrom of flying rock, or else the journey would have been even longer. She shook her head in an attempt to clear it, trying to fathom what had happened and what it meant to her. But only one thought resounded in her head: "Too late, too late, too late, too late, too late......."

Argo pricked her ears as she entered Amphipolis, recognising the town she'd been in with her rider only a week ago. Xena raised her head as she neared her mother's Inn, but even her mother's joyous smile could not raise her spirits, as she left the inn to greet her daughter. She dismounted and wordlessly helped Gabrielle off Horse, Xena supporting Gabrielle's good arm and the two of them rushed into her arms, hugging Cyrene.

"Xena, Gabrielle, what's happened?" Cyrene asked in alarm.

"It was the Romans," Gabrielle sobbed, "They trapped us and fought us to a standstill, but Joxer saved us, but he died. Then they just sailed away in their Galleys."

"Joxer? Was that the name of the man who left you the flowers?" Cyrene guessed.

"Yes it was, and I never even thanked him!" Gabrielle said, her tears coming down in a torrent. "I was always awful to him, but he just kept on giving me his love and I never even saw it!"

"Gabrielle, you know the dead can hear your thoughts," Xena said as calmly as she could. "Tell him the one thing he wanted to hear above anything else in the world."

"It's too late for that, he won't understand, he'll think I'm just saying it because I'm sad," Gabrielle protested.

"It's never too late to tell someone you love them," Cyrene said gently.

Gabrielle wiped her eyes, and stood alone, brushing off Xena's attempts to support her. "Joxer, I love you with all my heart. I do. Please don't ever leave me."

"Gabrielle, he'll always be with you in here," Xena said pointing to the Bard's heart.

"Mom, I think that's the right moment to send him back now," Cupid said to his mother. "Mom -"

But Aphrodite was oblivious to her son's words, her hanky blowing noisily and wiping her eyes.

"Ahem, Mom!" Cupid nudged her gently. "The job in hand?"

"I've got a cold, that's all," the Goddess said loudly. "Okay, you got it - and he's back." 'Dite confirmed with a wave of her hands.

The body of Joxer rolled off the back of Horse and onto the ground, falling in a heap on the ground.

"Come on Gabrielle, let's take him inside," Xena said gently to her friend. They moved over to his body and heaved it up between them. A low coughing could suddenly be heard and the warrior was suddenly smothered in hugs from both of his friends.

"Joxer, you're alive!" Gabrielle shouted in delight, then proceded to shake him vigorously with her good arm "Why didn't you tell me you had black powder in your backpack?"

"You didn't ask me," he replied with a thin smile.

"Don't you ever do that to me again! Do you know what I've been through?" Gabrielle remonstrated with him.

"No Gabby," he mumbled.

"And you're giving up that stupid armour and helmet."

"Yes, Gabby."

"And you're never singing that song again."

"Yes Gabby."

"And I love you."

"Yes Gabby -you-you do?" Joxer said in astonishment.

"Of course I do, you idiot!" and she kissed him with all the pent-up passion of a maiden parted for too long from her sweetheart.

"I love you too Gabby," he said tenderly, and wrapped his arms around her, matching her passion.

"Good to have you back Joxer," Xena said in relief, but the lovers were deaf to anyone but themselves. It was good to have him back, and the time for talking to him would be later. Much later, she thought, with a glance at her friends engrossed in each others company.

"Xena, can you tell me what's been going on with these two?" Cyrene inquired, looking a little lost.

"Mother, let's go inside and I'll tell you their story," Xena answered and they entered the Inn.

Cupid nodded with satisfaction at the happy pair, then vanished. Aphrodite paused a moment, beaming with joy at Joxer and his Lady Love together at last. Who says The Goddess of Love doesn't enjoy a happy ending, she thought contentedly to herself, then disappeared back to Olympus.

Please take the time to write to Jerry at studmuffin_jer@yahoo.com, and let him know how you liked the story!

COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER:
Xena: Warrior Princess, Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, Cyrene, and all other characters who have appeared in either series, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of StudiosUSA and Renaissance Pictures. The lyrics to "I Do" are owned by the appropriate copyright holders. No infringement of copyrights or trademarks is intended in the writing of this fan fiction. This story is copyright © 1999 by Jerry Hendy and is his sole property along with the story idea. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.