Ares, the God of War, grinned wolfishly at his companion. "Hi," he said, "how's your social diary at the moment?"

The woman looked at him thoughtfully. "Hmm, stuck in Tartarus for ever, no hope of early or any release. Apart from that, my schedule appears to be free - why, got something in mind?"

"Well if you agree to do a little favour for me, I can do a favour for you and get you released from here. Just get that irritating blonde and the idiot companions of Xena and kill them."

"And after that?" the woman queried, tilting her head to one side.

Ares shrugged. "Back to what you do best; torture, maiming, killing, whatever you want basically."

Callisto's eyes lit up with anticipation and laughed manically. "Oooh, good. Fun!"

As Gabrielle was walking back to the village, she was pondering over the sudden changes that had come over Joxer, when five heavily-weaponed men jumped out in front of her. She whirled her staff into action in an instant had three of them disarmed, while the other two were being held at bay. Another figure moved behind her, partially hidden by the shadows, and as Gabrielle whipped round to face the new threat, with the staff at ready, the figure drew a sword out in flash and in a blur of movement, held it at the bard's throat.

"Oh Gabrielle, is that any way to greet an old friend, hmm? No hellos, no hugs, no warm handshakes?"

"Callisto!"; gasped Gabrielle in shock, as the figure emerged from the shadows, revealing her old adversary. "How did you escape from Tartarus?"

"Well, Ares thought it was a bit dull around here, so in return for a little favour I'm doing for him, he called in a few favours he was owed, and here I am. Oh, but you must be tired from all that walking, why don't you have a rest?"

She signalled to her men and Gabrielle was unceremoniously gagged, blindfolded and bound to her staff, which was then carried to an unknown location. Half an hour later, she was untied from her staff and had the blindfold removed. She could see she was in a hut of some sort and saw Callisto standing by her side with a handful of men nearby.

"What do you want Callisto? Xena will be here soon, looking for me and she'll send you back to Tartarus where you belong." Gabrielle spoke these words bravely, though inside she was worried about what Callisto would do to her.

"Oh, I do hope she does come after me to rescue you, after all there'd be no fun in killing you unless she could see and do nothing about it. But you must be lonely, with just me to keep you company; So, where's the Idiot?"

"Who?"

"Oh, come on dear, you can do better than that; Bloody Joxer, Joxer the Mighty, where is he?" she asked sweetly, but there was nothing sweet about the razor-sharp knife that had suddenly appeared next to Gabrielle's throat.

"Joxer?! What do you want with Joxer?"

Gabrielle was in a panic now, it was clear what Ares' plan was now - Get Callisto to kill Xena's two friends and then Xena would have nothing to stop her darkside being brought forth and returning to his side as the Warrior Princess.

"Ahh, she remembers him, how sweet. To kill him of course - why else?" Callisto swished her blonde hair around, as she twisted the knife against Gabrielle's throat, drawing a prick of blood.

The only bright side, if there was a bright side, was that Callisto was a loose Balista and did things her way, and not Ares' way, which meant she'd only kill her and Joxer when she knew Xena was nearby and helpless and thus able to take the ultimate revenge on Xena for having robbed her of her family, she'd rob Xena of hers.

"So, where is he then?"

Gabrielle quickly weighed up her options, until she could only see only two choices, neither of which held much hope;

Stall and hope Xena could get here in time to rescue her and Joxer, or somehow escape and warn Joxer and Xena.

"I - I don't know, I haven't seen him for a while," the Bard bluffed.

Of the two options, the first option looked more probable, though that would depend on how securely she was guarded, especially as what she'd seen of Callisto's men numbered about fifty and she wasn't too sure how long she could hold out against all the persuasive methods that Callisto no doubt had in mind to find out where Joxer was. After a moment's thought, she decided to try and stall until nightfall, which was only an hour or so away, and try to escape when her captors were asleep.

Callisto grinned evilly, "Oh dear, she's forgotten. I shall just have to jog your memory for you, shan't I? Such a shame to spoil your pretty face with these sharp knives, but if you won't tell me where he is...."

The knife scraped roughly against Gabrielle's left cheek, causing her to cry out with pain and blood to slowly trickle down her face.

"You will tell me, won't you, if it gets too much for you - I'd hate to think you were just stalling to protect Joxer, because that would really annoy me and..." Callisto was interrupted in her interrogation of Gabrielle by one of her men pointing down the road at someone approaching. Callisto jumped from the crouched position and angrily hissed at the one who'd grabbed her attention, until he whispered something in her ear, when her demonic smile quickly returned.

She reached down and quickly snatched Gabrielle from the chair where she'd been sitting, dragging her out the front door. "It looks like you won't lose your face, after all. I'll give you two guesses who's just coming down the road, straight into my loving arms," and she held up two fingers.

"Xena?" Gabrielle said hopefully.

Callisto laughed out loud and held up one finger, "One more guess!"

Gabrielle gulped, "Not Joxer?," and straining her ears, could just make out the familiar tune that had driven her spare on numerous occasions. She went to call out to him, but felt a hand clamped over her mouth.

"Ah, ah, ah. We can't have you calling out, now can we?" said Callisto, as Joxer casually approached the unseen trap.

A sense of urgency grabbed Gabrielle and she bit hard into Callisto's hand, forcing her to release her hand covering Gabrielle's mouth, who managed to scream out a warning to Joxer, before she was thrown back inside the hut.

Joxer was dumbstruck for a moment, first hearing a muffled shout, then seeing his paramour struggling with an unseen assailant and a swarm of warriors that didn't look friendly heading his way.

"Zeus!" he shouted in alarm and was temporarily torn in two, but quickly realised he couldn't rescue Gabby by himself, so he did a rapid about-turn and legged it full-speed towards the Temple, as the way towards the village was barred by the chasing warriors. To his amazement, he was actually leaving the chasing men behind as his running speed picked up and was creating a gap between him and the chasing pack.

He rounded a bend and almost ran into Elena, who was just walking back into the Temple with a full basket of herbs, roots and fresh flowers. He grabbed hold of her and jostled her into the Temple.

"Not much time," he panted, almost out of breath, exhausted by his sprint, "Many warriors coming, you must hide, I'll lead them away from here. Back in a while!" and he raced out the door again. Elena had many unspoken questions on her mind, but she could see by the anxiety on his face, and the fact he was concerned for her safety, despite completely exhausted, that there was reason for caution. She looked around for a hiding place for her basket and herself, when an idea struck her.

She emptied the basket of its contents, put the basket to one side, and made the flowers, herbs and roots into an offering for Aphrodite. She then pulled the hood of her white healer's cloak over her head, stepped into an empty statue alcove and bowed her head, looking not unlike a statue in the dimmed light of the Temple.

Just in time, for barely moments later, three of Callisto's men entered the Temple, who started looking for Joxer through the various rooms. Although viscious and merciless killers, all three were wary of upsetting the Love Goddess, and were about to leave without desecrating the Temple, when Elena sneezed from the dust of the unused alcove and the three men grabbed her from her hiding place.

The healer was only a young girl in her late teens with a slight build on her, so the rough treatment she received from her assailants soon caused her pain and many bruises on her body. They interrogated her about Joxer, and although she truthfully denied all knowledge of his whereabouts at that moment, they refused to believe her and got the knives out for a lengthier inquisition.

At that juncture, two things happened; Joxer burst in, saw what was happening and went into a berserk-attack and Aphrodite appeared before the scene, also in a furious mood for what was happening in her Temple. Just as Joxer was about to launch his attack, time slowed to a halt as Aphrodite made her appearance before the combatants, and transported all four of them outside the Temple. She started time up again, but not before whispering a quick word in Joxer's ear: You've got some weapons you can fight with - Now go get 'em!

Joxer smiled grimly at her parting words. The three warriors saw him with no visible weapons and sized him up quickly as an easy capture. They sauntered casually towards him, thinking of what sport he could provide before they took him to Callisto. Just as they neared him however, Joxer drew the two Sai out of his wrist scabbards in a flash and quickly despatched two of them, one with a viscious slash down his left side and the other with his legs covered in numerous gashes and wounds. The third of the three turned pale at the fate of his two comrades writhing in agony on the grass, and turned tail and fled. Just before he reached the relative safety of the open road, he was pinned by his clothes against a large tree by the Sais Joxer had just thrown at him, and was knocked out by a heavy stick.

After retrieving his Sais and ensuring the three men were all out for the count, he returned to the Temple, and found the scene in the Temple with Elena strewn over a railing. He rushed over to her and saw the Love Goddess re-appear. She saw the worried look on his face and sought to reassure him.

"She isn't looking too clever at the moment kiddo, but I can fix that; after all she helped you back to recovery, so the least I can do is do the same for her."

She touched the healer's head and her body briefly glowed with a shimmering light, before returning to normal. Elena stirred gradually from where she was lying and saw Joxer looking over her, talking to someone she couldn't see behind her. She rose gingerly and coughed heavily.

"Joxer, what happened? The last thing I remember before I passed out, was three men questioning me and then pulling those knives out to use on me."

"You'd been beaten up pretty badly, but thanks to a little help, you're as good as new."

Elena felt herself for the bumps and bruises which were there previously and looked at Joxer in surprise. "I didn't know you were a healer, I thought you were just a Warrior"

"Erm, I can't heal, but she can," Joxer admitted

Elena looked at where Joxer was looking and couldn't see anyone. "Who are you talking about? There's only us here."

"Well, I suppose that's true in the actual sense, but of course there are some people who are here who choose to remain hidden?" Joxer said pointedly, tapping his foot impatiently.

"Sheesh," said Aphrodite, as she appeared in a blinding flash of light and sparkles, "I don't make personal appearances before like, everyone you know"

"Woah, do you think you could go easy on the strobelight effects?" said Joxer, shielding his eyes.

"What, never heard of a Goddess making a grand entrance before?" she chuckled. "This is my Temple, after all."

Elena opened her eyes wide in astonishment. "Goddess, as in Aphrodite?"

The Goddess beamed at her. "The one and only! Like I was saying to Studmuffin here, you helped him get better, it seemed only fair I do the same for you."

"Thanks for healing me, Aphrodite," said Elena, "I feel a lot better."

"Heyy, no problem, kid, glad to help"

"Studmuffin?" echoed Elena

Joxer coughed loudly, to cover his embarrassment. "Anyway, with these bandits holding Gabrielle, I can't hope to take them all on, so I thought I'd try and sneak past them to find Xena."

"Normally, that would be a good idea, but there's just a few teeny weeny drawbacks. Firstly, those aren't ordinary bandits, those are Callisto's men, and guess who's leading them?"

"Uh-oh, here comes trouble," murmured Joxer, "And the other reason is?

"Weeeelll, when I told your friend of your true feelings, I may have inadvertently transformed myself to look like Xena and put Xena in a sleep trance, so you and I aren't exactly high on her 'Friends to help list' this month," the Goddess said sheepishly

"Inadvertently transformed yourself to look like Xena? Is that like when you cough a lot and Pow! You look exactly like Xena?" Joxer said in a pained voice.

"Umm, not exactly, you see you have to?" but Joxer interrupted her with more than a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"So, let me get this straight; Even though Gabby's there with Callisto, facing the Gods alone know what, it's just me, Elena and you against Callisto and her horde, with absolutely no help from Xena looming at all?"

The Love Goddess smiled wryly. "Not quite, even if Xena thinks you're not worth rescuing, she'll still do it for that prissy bard. But Callisto has some Olympian help too."

"Did somebody call?" asked Ares, mockingly holding a hand up to his ear as he leant on a nearby pillar.

"Ares," Joxer said flatly, "I might have known. Come to gloat?"

The War God looked over the trio facing him and smirked.

"Well, well, if it isn't the idiot. I see from your handiwork outside you've become good with a weapon at last; of course, when Callisto and her men get hold of you, you'll need them!" Ares guffawed.

He gave a wave to Aphrodite "Hi, sis. Can't stop long, mustn't miss my Grandstand seat. Oh, and thanks for getting Callisto released from Tartarus for me, it's just going to be so much fun with her around again! I know I promised to keep off Xena's back for a week in return, but I didn't say anything about leaving her two companions alone."

"And you must be the other member of this dynamic triumvirate that's going to stop me and Callisto," he said to Elena, "Ares, God of War, at your service," and he bowed ironically.

"Fun though this has been, I must dash; can't miss the confrontation between Callisto and Xena - whoever wins, I win," and with that parting shot, he vanished.

"Now what? We appear to be in the stickiest situation since Sticky the stick insect got stuck on a stickybun, especially with Callisto on the loose," Joxer said, giving Aphrodite a very hard stare.

She dismissed his stare with a wave of her hand. "Oh, that was just the price I had to pay for not having Xena ripping our heads off. Anyway, Callisto's no longer a Goddess, as Hades wouldn't let her out with all that power at her disposal. She's still immortal, but there's a twist."

"What sort of twist?" Joxer asked curiously. So she told them, and after she'd finished speaking, Joxer had a grin so wide you could hang washing on it.

"And Hades agreed to this? Isn't it a little unusual?" queried Elena.

Aphrodite smiled knowingly. "Yes it is, but it appealed to his sense of humour."

"Does Ares know?" asked Joxer, still smiling broadly.

Aphrodite shook her head. "No. Can't wait to see my Brother's face when he finds out," and she giggled at the thought of Ares being really mad, but unable to do anything about it.

"What was that Ares was saying about your handiwork, Joxer?" mused Elena.

"Hmm? Oh, that was the three men who were attacking you, so I stopped them," and he rubbed his scabbards for emphasis.

"You didn't kill them, did you?" cried Elena in surprise.

"You're kidding, right? This is Joxer you're talking to, who's never killed anything or anyone larger than a rabbit, who had all the fighting abilities of a squirrel. Anyway, I've known kiddo here for too long to know he couldn't kill someone unless there was no alternative."

Joxer gave the Love Goddess another hard stare. Thanks, Aphrodite, thanks a lot, for reminding me of that, he thought.

Elena went outside, looked at the still figures outside, and came back in again. She motioned to Joxer to follow her, and between them, they brought the three men in and laid them out in the Temple.

He gave Aphrodite a querying look and raised his eyebrows. She shrugged, "It's her nature, I guess. Even though they tried to hurt her, she's a healer, so let her heal. And if they try anything, I'll turn them into decorative statues," she ended darkly.

Joxer made to leave, but was stopped by Elena on his way out.

"What about your shoulder?" she said sternly and sat him down, while she examined the injury.

She ummed and ahhed for a while, feeling around his shoulder gently, until she grabbed a bone with both hands and twisted it, firmly.

"Owwwww," Joxer cried out in sudden pain, and then found he could move his left arm properly again.

"Hey, you fixed it!" he said gleefully.

"What Joxer means, Elena," Aphrodite said pointedly, "is thankyou." Both of the women tried not to laugh and failed.

"Yeah, thanks for making my arm better. Well, I won't be long, one way or another. Or another. A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Farewell," and he strode off full of purpose, whistling an eerie tune, on a date with destiny........

Continue >>>