Joxer the Mighty wasn't feeling very mighty at this moment in time. He'd got clobbered again in a fight and was feeling very much the worse for wear. He'd been having a stroll through a wood and singing his song, when he heard fighting up ahead. As soon as he saw his best friends, Xena and Gabrielle in a clash with bandits, he charged in recklessly as he always did, without noticing that the bandits were half-beaten and his friends had the skirmish under control. He rushed towards the nearest bandit and swinging his sword wildly, got a hit on his opponent, but his impetus had carried him through and he stumbled into the figure of another bandit.

A swordthrust was deflected off his makeshift chest armour and went straight through his left shoulder, drawing a scream of agony. Seeing that the rest of his comrades were fleeing, the bandit attacking him left him, after a few well-aimed kicks and joined in the retreat from Xena and Gabrielle.

After the Warrior Princess and the Amazon Bard had seen off the bandits, they saw to their friend and patched up the worst of his wounds, although before he drifted off into unconsciousness, he'd heard a brief snatch of conversation between his friends, which hurt him a lot more than his wounds.

As they were repairing his scratches, bruises and shoulder wound, they were whispering to each other in harsh voices.

"Gods, what was he doing, charging into the bandits like that? I mean, it's not as though he had any skill or anything, and he didn't do any damage anyway."

"Well, he meant well at least, even if as a warrior he's next to useless. He probably saw us fighting and just charged in to try and help."

"I can't believe my ears; you're sticking up for him after all the trouble he's caused and usually puts our lives into danger, when we have to save him, time after time."

"I'm just saying, that you should go easy on him. It doesn't look as though he's going to be doing much of anything for a good while yet, and he could do with someone to talk to, while he recovers from his injuries."

"Me? Oh thanks a lot, why do I get stuck with him? Why can't we dump him in a temple, and let the healers look after him?"

"Well, it was probably you he saw first, when he attacked the bandits."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?"

At this moment, he drifted off into unconsciousness. He awoke, what seemed several days later in a temple surrounded by healers, attending to his shoulder wound and his minor injuries. "I guess they did leave me behind in a temple, after all," he thought ruefully.

"Not quite, kiddo, they just left you in my temple so these healers could see to you properly, they'll be back in a short while," said a voice behind his ear.

"Aphrodite!" He recognised her voice instantly, and laughed hollowly at the irony of being in one of her temples, of all places.

"Woah, don't get too heavy on the angst vibes, I know things between you and me haven't always worked out, but maybe we can cook something up to fix your immediate problem," she said, appearing before him in a shimmer of light.

"Hey, where'd the temple go? And which problem of mine did you have in mind - the fact that I can't defend myself, despised by everybody, at least those who give me any thought, and the one woman I want more than anything wants to dump me in a temple and thinks of me as a burden to get rid of as soon as possible?" he said bitterly.

"Well, it's easier to talk on another plane, without everybody listening in. Don't get all stress-heavy, your body's still being seen to! Obviously, I want to help you out with Gabrielle, but maybe I can help you out with the others as well."

"Oh, you mean like the time when I became a hero and split up a happy couple and almost put two kingdoms at war at the same time? Or would this be the time when your grandson let fly with all of Cupid's arrows and she fell in love with me, but as soon as the arrows effect wore off, she treated me the same way she always had?" He grimaced at the memories.

"Oh, puh-leeze, they were trying to knock two of my temples down," the Goddess protested, "Anyway it made you look good in front of your paramour and I thought you'd be glad about when she was under the arrow's effect, at least you got to kiss her and got close to her without your nose being squelched.?

"Yeah," Joxer said dreamily. "Hey, that's not the point and you know it - I always end up the fallguy, the one who gets all the grief stuck on him, and everyone else ends up happy ever after,? he retorted angrily. "Like after Cupid took the effect off Gabby and she laughed the idea of being in love with me - how do you think that made feel?"

The Goddess could see that Joxer was getting quite upset, and so she tried to calm him down. "Okay, okay, I can see that you've had a bit of a bummer, as far as the lovelife goes, but like I said, I'll try and sort it for you." She stood up and had a think for a moment or two, and spoke to him again. "Alrighty, first of all, let?s lose the armour and the helmet," and both items vanished.

"Hey," he objected, "they were hand-pounded and how am I going to protect myself now??

Aphrodite stood there, strumming her fingers against her hip, impatiently. "Like, remind me how often the armour and the helmet actually saved you from injury?"

"Um..." Joxer strained his mind back, trying desperately to think of an occasion when his body and head had been averted from injury, and couldn't.

"So," said Aphrodite triumphantly, "the helmet and the armour are out of here. Okaay, now the weaponry - you can't use the sword in combat and you're no good at fisticuffs, either. The only thing you're any good at is talking yourself out of trouble and running away. Hmmm, let's think - aha, got it," and suddenly Joxer felt odd, as though he'd been changed in some way.

"What did you do to me now?" Joxer wanted to know and the Goddess of Love smiled a knowing smile.

"Just a little helping hand, for when you get into trouble. You can now run a bit faster and you now have the gift of the Blarney.?

"The what?" Joxer said blearily.

"It's something from Hibernia that'll make you sound better in conversation and should ease conflict in bars and taverns."

"Well, that's fine, but what if I can't avoid trouble, by running or talking my way out of it?"

"Don't go away, back in a minute!" called Aphrodite and disappeared in a flash.

"Like I'm actually going to go anywhere?" he called after her.

"OK, sorted. Ares owes me a favour, so...." the Goddess said, suddenly re-appearing and with a snap of her fingers, Joxer's sword disappeared, and his Scabbard was transformed into two smaller scabbards under his wrists with two weapons within.

"So what in Tartarus are these, then, and where's my sword gone?" Joxer asked as he peeled the two unfamiliar weapons from the holders beneath his wrists.

"Simple, kiddo, you aren't any good at using the sword - to put it bluntly, you're more of a danger to yourself than you are to your opponents, so the sword's been ditched and you now have two Fighting Sai, with the skill that my leather-wearing brother just gave you, but you can't use the fighting skill for any other weapon."

Joxer pulled out the two weapons and held them up to the light. He looked puzzled and disappointed. "Aren't these just fancy daggers?"

"No, they're specialist warrior weapons, which should suit you down to the ground, as you'll be the only one in the whole of Greece able to use them!" the Goddess replied.

"Look, why don't you have a practise with them against something and familiarize yourself with them" and a warrior appeared before him and charged Joxer. Joxer's first instinct was to run, but he could see that his opponent was faster than him, so he pulled out his two new weapons and with a skill he didn't know he possessed, combined the two Sai and blocked his opponent's longsword and with a blur of movement, while holding his opponent off with one Sai, he slashed at the unguarded arm with the other Sai, forced the Warrior back and did the same to the swordarm.

The Warrior disappeared as quickly as he'd arrived and Joxer looked at his new weapons with respect and amazement. "Wow! They're really, really good, aren't they?" he exclaimed with surprise.

"You'd better believe it honey, but don't tell everyone about them, else they'll all want one!" Aphrodite laughed.

"Well, that's great, I'm a new man, new weapons, new skills, but what about er, um, Gabrielle?" he finished lamely.

"Oh, don't you worry about her, studmuffin, I've got something special lined up for her. Can't tell you about it yet, that'd spoil the surprise" and the last thing he heard before he awoke back in the Temple, was the laughter of the Love Goddess.

Xena and Gabrielle were back at the tavern in the village they were staying in, after seeing how Joxer was doing in the Temple. They'd found a healer named Elena in a nearby village and she'd taken care of Joxer, cleaning up his damaged shoulder and making him comfortable.

"Well, he should be alright now, he's not looking as pale as he was amd his shoulder should heal up in time," Xena said to her companion. "He should be up and about in a few days."

Gabrielle looked at her and sighed. "Looks like we can expect a few more choruses of "Joxer The Mighty", then. So how long before we make a move?"

"As soon as Joxer's fit and well enough to travel, we'll be on our way." Xena thought for a moment and then went to the bar and ordered a pair of tumblers of strong drinks from the barmaid. She took it over to the table where she and Gabrielle were sitting and took a deep breath. Gabrielle looked at Xena, wondering what was on her mind.

"So what do you think of Joxer then?" she asked.

The Bard looked at her in surprise. "What do I think of Joxer? What sort of question is that? I thought you were going to ask me something important, not about the Warrior-wannabe who can't defend himself, ends up in trouble all the time, which we have to dig him out of, and is always singing that stupid song of his."

Xena sighed in exasperation and tried again. "No, not the facade he puts up but the actual person, the man inside."

Gabrielle was puzzled; Why suddenly all these questions about Joxer, completely out of the blue, she thought.

She pondered a moment or two, and said, "Okay, I guess he is generous and helps others out in his own inimitable way, and he is courageous, even if he is too impetuous and impulsive. But why all these questions about Joxer?"

Xena took a long gulp of one of the two tumblers of strong drink she'd just got from the bar and took another deep breath. "You remember that affair with Cupid's arrows?"

The bard nodded her head. "Yes, of course I remember - how could I forget it? Singing Joxer's Song & Draco pledging himself to do good on my behalf. I mean, like me and Joxer could actually love each other for real!"

Xena looked at her friend and said, "Well, he was the only one who wasn't struck by the arrows - he loves you for real, no spells, no charms, no help from the Gods, just pure love."

There was a long pause and neither said anything for a moment. Judging by the look on Gabrielle's face, this had come as a complete surprise, and was the last thing she was expecting to hear. She tried several times to say something, but words failed her. She grabbed the second tumbler and drank from it, to steady herself.

Her voice shook as she spoke. "He loves me? I-I-I can't believe it! I thought that was just a crush! But why raise this now?"

"Because I saw the look on his face when you spoke over him, after we saw off those bandits. It was a look that stuck in my mind, I'm worried he'll do something rash." Xena looked anxious as she spoke.

"But why should he do something rash?"

"Well, you know how you complain how Argo seems to hate you, little things that upset you? Try thinking of the way you treat Joxer, the endless nose tweaks, the non-stop criticism, the way he tries to do something for you but it goes pearshaped and you give him grief, without thinking of the trouble he went through to try and make you feel good.

"How about the time he gave you that necklace that cost him his father's scabbard and you virtually ignored it, because the enchanted scroll was in the scabbard when he'd sold the scabbard. Or when he tried to restore your memory when you were purging yourself of all the bad memories of the recent past and even admitted to giving you misleading memories, but you didn't even thank him. Or the time you were in the Amazon Village in the Purification Hut and he had the guts to stand up to me and try to stop me from killing you?"

"Alright, alright, I've been a bit rough on him at times, " Gabrielle admitted, "but I do value him as a friend"

Xena looked at her scornfully. "So why don't you show it from time to time? At least go and talk to him for a while. A few words of comfort wouldn't go a miss in his present condition. You treat Argo better than you do Joxer."

Gabrielle was almost tearful under this onslaught. "Why are you being like this Xena? Why the concern for Joxer and his welfare? You and him haven't exactly been best friends in the past. I know he gets on your nerves as much as he does mine."

"I know I've been harsh towards him in the past, but he's grown a lot since we first met him. And he did help me through that time when you jumped in the lava with Hope, when I could have become the Warrior Princess again, if he hadn't made me lose the red mists that were clouding my thoughts."

Xena laughed aloud for a moment. "I still remember a certain Bard who became a tag-along, not very good at fighting, irritating habits, I wonder whatever happened to her?"

Gabrielle gave a wry smile. "Oh well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to go and see how he's doing, maybe talk for a while. What are you going to be doing while I'm gone?"

Xena finished off her drink and got up from the chair. "I'll give Argo a brush down and make sure she's got enough water and something to eat. I've heard rumours of a Warlord with an army approaching the viilages and towns in this area, so I'll grab a bite to eat and then see what information I can gather on this Warlord. I'll probably see you in an hour or two."

The Bard waved her friend goodbye, and headed down the road to the Temple. Xena watched her leave from the door by the stable and as soon as she was out of sight, transformed herself back into the form of the Love Goddess.

"Oooh, that was fun," she giggled, "I not only got her to think of Joxer but I wound her up a bit. That'll teach her to mess around with my studmuffin and trash my temples! I wonder if Xena's awake from that sleep I put her into yet? Time enough for that later, I'll just have a look-in on kiddo and his paramour first," and vanished in a sparkle of light.

As Joxer awoke, he looked around him and saw the familiar surroundings of the Temple, and a young woman in the white cloak of a healer by his side. He glanced briefly to his right and saw his armour and helmet piled neatly to one side, with his sword piled on top. "I guess it was just a dream," he murmured to himself.

The healer finished wrapping the fresh bandages around his injured shoulder and felt his forehead. "Good," she said, " Your temperature's coming down and your shoulder is free of infection. Nice to see you awake again, you were out for quite a while. By the way, I'm Elena. I'm a local healer from the village down the road. Your friends saw me when I was out gathering herbs and roots and took me to you."

"How long was I out for?" Joxer asked her.

"Just under 2 days," Elena replied, " Your two friends came in regularly to see how you were doing, they're staying in a tavern at the moment, in the nearby village."

Joxer tried to sit up in the bed he was on, but he felt dizzy and had to hold himself steady with his good arm.

"You're still quite weak from the wound you received, it's probably not a good idea to move about too much until you get your strength back. You were very lucky, it could have been a lot worse, that sword could have broken your shoulderbone, instead it just went straight through and out the other side." She passed him a bowl of broth and a spoon. "Can you manage with that alright? You could do with some sustinence, as you haven't had anything to eat since you got the injury."

Joxer managed to rest the bowl in his lap without spilling too much and started eating the broth. He nodded in answer, and she was just about to leave his room, when Elena snapped her fingers in exasperation.

"I knew there was something I'd forgotten," and she felt beneath the bed and brought out a cloth package. This was left for you by a friend - she didn't leave her name. There's a note attached in there somewhere. I'll be back in a moment, I've just got to get a few things and boil some herbs and water up."

Elena left the room and after having finished his broth which he enjoyed thoroughly, with a little difficulty he opened the loosely wrapped package. In it were two Sai in two small scabbards, made from his father's scabbard, and a note. He picked up one of the Sai and swished it about experimentally with his good arm. The movement of the weapon seemed natural, like it was an extension of his arm, and he grinned as he realised that it hadn't been a dream at all.

He put the Sai back in its holder and opened the neatly folded note. He smiled as he read it, folded it back up again, putting it back in the package with the Sai and put the package to one side.

Elena re-entered the room with a bowl of sweet-smelling steaming water and some fresh bandages. She opened the window to let some air in, mopped his forehead and his damaged arm tenderly with a damp cloth and looked at the package by his helmet, sword and armour. "What was in the package, anything nice?" she asked.

Joxer grinned broadly and nodded. "Oh yes, it's from an old friend. It's something for a fresh start and just a little reminder that she hadn't forgotten me. Thanks for the broth, that was jolly tasty and thanks for looking after me so well"

Elena smiled at the compliment and took the bowl and spoon from his bed. "Thank you, I wish all my patients were as happy as you, after what you?ve been through."

She turned towards the door but heard footsteps coming up the path and craned her head out the window to see who it was.

"Ah, I see one of your friends has returned to see you, I'll go and show her through," she said.

Joxer sat there alone for a moment, the sweet-smelling water mixing with the fresh air from the gentle breeze wafting through the window, clearing some of the grogginess from his head and the stale air from the room.

"Thanks Aphrodite, for your presents and your presence. I knew I could rely on you when everyone else had given up on me," he murmured in a silent prayer to the Goddess.

Elena opened the door and showed Gabrielle in to see him. She looked at the pair of them for a moment, and left them together, saying "I'll be back in a while, I need to replenish my herbs and bandages, so I'll leave you two alone for a while. I'm sure you've got loads of news to catch up on"

Joxer greeted his friend as she sat down on the chair by the bed. "Hi Gabby, how have you been?"

"Fine, thankyou, it's good to see you up and about again. How are you now?" she asked.

"Well, I've been better!" he joked and laughed heartily. "No, I should be up and about within the next day or so, and I've got a few things to show you when my shoulder heals up. What have you and Xena been up to while I've been here?"

The Bard looked at him in surprise, he seemed in good humour, better than he had for some time and he appeared to have a new-found self-confidence.

"I've been writing up a few scrolls and entertaining the locals in the tavern where we're staying with a few tales. Xena's been on the look out for a Warlord rumoured to be heading this way and been collecting information on him from various sources in the area. Oh, and Argo sends her best wishes too!"

The two of them chatted easily together and Aphrodite smiled happily at something finally working out for Joxer at last. "Time to go and wake up Xena," she thought, "she won't be happy about being put to sleep, but she wouldn't have told Gabrielle how Joxer really felt about her and neither would Joxer. This way, everybody wins," and she disappeared in a twinkle of lights.

After Gabrielle had left him to go back to Xena, Joxer was taking some light exercise in the grounds behind the Temple, with a sling on his dodgy shoulder, when Aphrodite appeared before him in a flash of light.

"So's how everything going, lover boy? Have you and that bard finally got something going at long last?" she asked him.

He blushed, in fond memory of the afternoon he and the love of his life had just spent together, talking on almost every subject under the sun for what seemed like hours.

"So, I'll take that as a yes, then?" the Goddess laughed. "Well kiddo, it's about time too." You?ve been trying to get close to her for long enough; I guess it took a busted shoulder to finally convince her that you've been there for her all this time."

Joxer smiled ruefully. "Pity it couldn't have been something less painful like a toothache," he said, rubbing his damaged shoulder.

"Well, duh! I am the Goddess of Love; you should know by now that nothing comes easy in affairs of the heart. Now she knows you loves her, everything's going to be cool. Well, as fun as it's been talking to you, I gotta check out my other Temples. You're not my only worshipper, you know. Ooops!" as Aphrodite realised she'd just let the proverbial cat out of the bag.

"She knows? How did she find out?" Joxer was in total shock at the news he'd kept so well-hidden through these years, and for all he knew, to the Elysian Fields and beyond, had finally emerged to the knowledge of his paramour.

Aphrodite looked guiltily at Joxer. "Well, like it could have been anyone but me who'd have told her how you felt about her. It was just so obvious to everyone but her, what your feelings were. Even Xena knew, for Olympus' sake!"

She started suddenly, "Uh-oh, trouble's brewing, see you later, kiddo!" and she vanished in a sparkle of lights.

Joxer stood there thinking for a moment, pondering on the latest of life's little mysteries. For what seemed like an eternity, he'd been in love with Gabrielle, but she'd been oblivious to it, and treated him at best, like a younger brother who constantly got on her nerves. Now, after all this time, she knew what the rest of the world seemed to know. Joxer was baffled.

"But she'd been nice to him, even after she'd been told that he'd loved her, whereas normally if he'd tried to tell her anything like that or do something nice for her, she'd have given him a noseclench. P'raps things were finally turning out good at last," he thought and went back into the Temple.

After Aphrodite had left Joxer, she'd gone and awoken Xena from the sleep trance she'd put her under. To put it mildly, Xena had not been happy, to say the least. Not only had she been put in an involuntary sleep, but she'd been impersonated and her best friend had been upset, and all for Joxer????!!!!

The kind of mood she was in, she looked like she was about to tear Joxer's head off and then have a go at Aphrodite, be she a Goddess or not. The Love Goddess only managed to calm her down a little, by revealing that she'd got Ares' promise to leave her alone for a week.

Unfortunately, this agreement was to have unforeseen repercussions in the days to follow....

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