Chapter one: That Fatal Night

Sunshine filled the room which caused Gabrielle to shade her sensitive eyes and groan. She threw a blanket over her head, wanting to escape the brightness and the yelling outside her door. The Amazon curled into a tight ball, her head throbbing and body aching. She longed to sleep and forget the pain but she could not. Gabrielle was to ill to think, but she wondered what she was doing in a strange room. Finally, the events of the day before started to come back to her and she remembered that Joxer joined her at a tavern so they could wait for Xena.

Gabrielle's eyes flew open and she attempted to gathered her senses. She looked at her bare flesh. Where were her clothes? Where was Joxer?

Someone snored loudly and moved next to her; and despite her condition the Amazon turned quickly.

"Joxer!" She cried, kicking him out of bed. He landed with a thud and she pulled the blanket close to her.

"Hey!" Joxer sat up. "Ohhh," he grumbled, as his hand went to his head. Finally, he noticed the woman he loved holding a multi-colored blanket to her chest, her naked shoulders exposed. "Hi Gabby. Hey did you know you are naked?"

"So are you, you idiot!" She snapped and Joxer, suddenly realizing his state, grabbed for the blanket. "No, it is mine!"

"You don't need all of it! You don't have that much to cover!" She gave him a dirty look, which went unnoticed.

"I swear to the Gods Joxer, that if you don't let go of this cover I am going to kill you!" She growled through her teeth and she pulled as hard as she could.

"No." He was defiant in his answer and continued to pull on his end. The material started to give way but neither heard the ripping of material. Finally the blanket ripped in two causing Gabrielle to tumble over the bed.

"Ah-ha!" Joxer declared triumphantly as he held up his small piece of cloth. When he did not see the Amazon Joxer became concerned.

"Gabby are you.."

"Joxer," Gabrielle sat up, covering herself as best she could. "I am going to kill you." He smiled. Annoyed, she grabbed the pillow and smacked him in the head. "Turn around and no peeking." Joxer turned his back to her. "Are you sure you can't see?"

"I can see the wall I am looking at."

"That's not what I meant." Gabrielle quickly stood up holding the cloth to her naked body as she roamed about the room, searching for her clothes. Much to her dismay, she found her clothes scattered about. She picked up his shirt and threw it at him.

"I can't find my boot." The Amazon Queen hopped around the room.

"Gabby," Joxer began, his voice soft as he pulled on his pants. "Do you think we.."

"Don't even say it Joxer!" He stood up and turned to face her, both fully dressed, save Gabrielle who was still missing her boot. She did not want to think of the two of them embracing for a night of hot passion. The Amazon shuttered and pushed the thought from her mind as quickly as it entered.

"I mean we were both naked and.."

"What did I say Joxer? Found it." She hastily pulled on her boot and looked at him. His brown eyes gazed downward and a sad look covered his face.

It troubled him to think that they had both engaged in the most intimate act and he did not remember it. Since his first meeting with Gabrielle he longed to show her how much he loved her. Joxer dreamt about the first time he could make love to her, and he wanted to make everything perfect. And when he finally got his chance he screwed it up and took advantage of her while she was intoxicated.

"Gabby," he did not raise his eyes.

"Lets go Joxer." She marched past him and stopped at the door. "We'll just pretend this never happened, whatever happened, which was nothing. Is that understood?" She did not look at him when she spoke.

"Yes." He agreed, although he wanted to talk to her about. Joxer needed to know if she remembered anything about the night before, but he did not dare ask.

They emerged from the room and all eyes were on them. Some of the patrons turned to one another and began to talk in a low voice, pointing at the couple. Gabrielle suddenly felt her face become red.

"What are they looking at?"

"Maybe you're a screamer." Joxer offered. Without hesitation she punched Joxer with such force his head jerked backwards then marched out of the tavern hastily. Joxer shook his head, his eye throbbing.

"Gods," Xena grumbled as she walked towards Gabrielle and Joxer, leading Argo by the reins. Their expressions told her that something was amiss. Both stood about five feet away from each other, and were looking in opposite directions. Gabrielle's arms were crossed and she had her nose in the air, while Joxer was touching his newly blackened eye. A sullen expression creased Joxer's face and the warrior knew it was not because of his eye. Joxer always looked so pathetic when he and Gabrielle fought. Xena did not know if she was ready for one of their episodes.

"Hey." Xena muttered. "Nice shiner. What happened Joxer?" She lifted up his chin to inspect what she assumed was Gabrielle's handy work.

"He ran into a door. Can we go now?" the bard asked, in a snippy tone and began walking away from the tavern before Xena could answer.

"What's her problem? Xena probed hoping to get some information out of Joxer.

"Nothing," he grumbled and marched past Xena.

"Great, its going to be a long journey." She rolled her eyes and decided to stay behind the two fighting factions.

What did he say to get me into bed with him? Or was it something he did? Maybe it was me, no, I would never WILLINGLY sleep with Joxer. Not while I was in my right mind, anyway. Gods, I can't believe he used me like that.. Of all people, of all men, who would do something like that I would never dream Joxer would be that type of man. I thought he was better then that. He pretends he doesn't remember, but I think he does. I bet he has been plotting this whole thing out for months, years!

Gabrielle's face twisted in disgust as she continued to walk. Anger built within her as she though of Joxer taking advantage of her in her "delicate" state.

"Do you have to walk to close to me?" She barked.

"What?"

"Don't pretend like you don't know. Do you always have to be near me all the time?"

"Gabby I am about six feet fr--"

"You keep on moving closer and closer."

"Fine!" Joxer threw up his hands. "I'll walk behind you, your majesty. I wouldn't want to upset you."

"Fine!"

"Good!" He yelled back, and stopped walking. Xena passed Joxer who refused to look at her. The warrior was fully aware that she could not let this bickering go on for much longer, yet she was hesitant to get in the middle. Finally she mustered up the courage and decided to ask.

"What is it with you and Joxer?" Xena asked, walking beside her best friend.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"OK." Xena looked back to see Joxer still standing where she left him.

"Can I start walking now, your majesty?"

"No!" She called, back and Xena gave her a harsh look.

"You know he is going to stand there for the rest of the day unless you tell him he can move. You know how Joxer is."

"I don't care. He deserves it, for what he did to me."

"What did he do to you?" Xena asked, unable to fathom what Joxer could have done to receive such a wrath.

"We had sex."

Xena smiled. "About time."

"What?" She looked up suddenly. "No, Xena I don't think you understand what I said. I had intimate relations, intercourse, sex with Joxer!"

"Yeah, and..?" The warrior was failing to see the problem.

Gabrielle sighed, then turned to Xena. "I never wanted to have sex with Joxer."

"Yeah, right."

"Xena!" She cried. "I have just experienced one of the most traumatic events of my life and you're not supporting me." The Amazon was hurt by her friend's unsympathetic response.

"I don't think having sex with Joxer qualifies as the most traumatic event of your life." Xena smiled. "Unless he was really bad. Well?" Her blue eyes lit up, longing to hear the details of their tryst.

"I don't know."

"Wow you really need to live a little."

"That's not what I meant!" She took a deep breath. "I don't remember any of it because.....Joxer got me drunk and took advantage of me."

"Joxer?" Xena questioned and looked back to see the man still standing in the same spot. "Are we talking about the same Joxer here? The Joxer who would never hurt anyone? The Joxer who is so in love with you he would never do anything to harm you? The Joxer that goes.."

"Yes, that Joxer!"

"I don't believe it."

Gabrielle glanced up at Xena. "Believe what you want." And without another word she walked past her best friend, annoyed by the indifferent attitude she was receiving.

"Joxer," Xena's voice was soft as she spoke to him. He looked up from his own campfire and smiled. Joxer decided it was in the best interest of everyone if he made his own camp away from the women. Xena, of course, protested his action but he held firm.

"Hey Xena." She could tell his greeting was not heartfelt and she smiled back as she sat next to him. Joxer could not hide his emotions well. "What brings you to my camp?"

"Cut the small talk Joxer, I know what happened between you and Gabrielle.." He looked down immediately. "So tell me how it happened?"

He sighed, "I wish I knew, Xena." Joxer did not raise his eyes as he spoke, he was too embarrassed to admit what he had done. "I would never hurt Gabby, you know that. And I swear to the Gods that if I could take it back I would. I hate to see her angry at me, or hurting." His voice became very low. "And I know I hurt her."

Xena was sympathetic to Joxer's plight. Deep down the warrior knew that he would never hurt Gabrielle, he loved her too much. She could see the pain in his face and hear it in the way he spoke.

"Tell her Joxer. Tell Gabrielle that you did not mean to do it and that you don't remember any of it and.."

"She won't listen to me. She hates me." Joxer was steadfast in his response. "There is nothing I can do," he swallowed, "but leave. I'll do what she has always wanted and leave her alone forever." Joxer turned away from Xena as he spoke, attempting to hide the tears which were swelling within his eyes.

"Joxer I don't think you need to do...."

"Xena, listen." Joxer held up his hand to protest. "I've never really been a help to you two, so I might as well leave. Maybe if I do Gabrielle won't hate me so much."

Xena nodded. "I respect your answer Joxer and I know you don't want to hurt Gabrielle. But I need you to do something. Promise me you will do something for me."

"Why so I can screw it up?"

"Come on Joxer," Xena pressed. "I just need you to stay with us for a little while longer. I have a mission." She was lying, of course, but he would never know the truth. Besides, Xena knew that trouble followed her around so she was bound to see some action. She was plotting to get Gabrielle and Joxer on speaking terms again, even if it killed her.

"How much longer?"

"What does it matter? You don't have anything else to do." Her response was harsher then she intended and Xena was instantly sorry. "Look Joxer I need you." The sentence sounded odd even to Joxer.

"Yeah?" He smiled a little.

"Yeah." Joxer nodded and Xena stood up. "I'm glad you decided to stay."

Joxer stayed with Xena like he said he would but much to the warrior's dismay she and her companions had a quiet month, save the occasional fights from Gabrielle and Joxer. Xena's plan of making peace between them had failed, and despite her valiant attempts and cleaver tricks nothing seemed to work. Instead the two grew further and further apart as Gabrielle lashed out at Joxer for everything and he grew more reclusive, guilt eating away at his conscience.

"Gods," Gabrielle grumbled, wiping her arm across her mouth. She stumbled out of the large weeds to see Xena standing before her. "Hi." Gabrielle forced herself to smile, but the warrior knew something was amiss. It had been the third time since breakfast that she ran off into the weeds.

"Sick again?"

"Yeah," she admitted sheepishly. "I don't understand it Xena, but everything smells funny and makes me ill. I'm tired and your cooking is worse then normal."

"Very funny."

"What do you think I have?" Xena placed a hand to her friend's forehead. Xena thoughtfully made a noise and then opened Gabrielle's mouth, then inspected her eyes.

"When's the last time you bleed?"

"What?" Gabrielle asked, shocked.

"How long?"

"I don't know. Why?"

"Longer then a month?"

"Maybe, why?" Gabrielle did not like where this conversation was headed. "What does that have to do with my illness?"

"Has it happened since you and Joxer, well you know?"

"Of course." She said defiantly, and crossed her arms. "At least, I think it has." Gabrielle began to back track through the month and up to their meeting in the tavern. Suddenly she turned very pale. "By the Gods."

"Yep, you're pregnant." Xena smiled and Gabrielle gave her a dirty look.

"This isn't happy news!"

"Why not? Joxer will be thrilled."

"I'm not. No, no, no, this can't be happening. Gods how did this happen?" Xena opened her mouth and Gabrielle pointed to her and said in a harsh tone.. "Don't answer that!" She started to pace. "What am I going to do?"

"Have the baby," Xena offered.

"No, you don't understand, this ruins all my plans. How am I suppose to fight with you if I have a baby and Joxer with me?"

Xena reached out and grabbed her by the shoulder. "Gabrielle things change in life. Nothing works out like we originally thought. Besides," Xena smiled, "now is your chance to have the life you have always dreamed about. You and Joxer can raise a family."

"With Joxer?"

"Come off it Gabrielle, you like him."

"Of course I like Joxer, he's my friend. But I can't be his wife. I don't know. I don't want to think about this right now." She pulled from Xena's grip and walked away.

"Well you are going to have to tell him sooner or later." Gabrielle did not answer her as she walked towards the pond. Xena shook her head.

Gabrielle could not get the thought of being a wife and mother out of her head. The idea did not set well with her. She looked down at her firm stomach and imagined what it would be like in eight months and groaned. She hated Joxer for doing this to her, and she hated herself for getting drunk that fatal night and allowing herself to be seduced by Joxer. He must have sweet talked her into sleeping with him. Or maybe he put something in her drink.

"No," she said out loud. "Joxer's not like that. He would never do something like that." Still, she needed someone to blame and Joxer seemed like the best person.

The Amazon picked up a rock and threw it into the pond. She watched as the ripples moved across the water and she sighed. Gabrielle wondered if her fait was to marry Joxer and become his wife. She picked up another rock and threw it with greater force.

"Hey nice shot," Joxer said emerging from the woods. "Can we talk?" She did not answer him, and he proceeded unsure if he should. At least she did not run from him, or punch him like she tended to do when Joxer started recent conversations. "Look, Gabby I'm sorry for what happened. If I could I would take it back, really I would." Joxer hated to see her upset and for the past month she had been looming over the subject. "Are you ever going to talk to me again?" He was fearful of her answer.

She did not turn around to look at him. "I'm pregnant."

"Really?" His heart dropped. "Who's the father?"

Gabrielle turned to him. "Joxer, you're the father." She threw another rock into the pond.

"Oh. Oohhhh," The information needed a moment to sink in. "By the Gods are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." She snapped and stood up. "Thank you for ruining my life." Without another word Gabrielle turned and walked towards camp. Joxer stood stunned, unable to move.

"Hey Joxer," Xena said, walking up behind him. He was leaning up against a tree, still staring at the pond as he had been for the past two hours. "Are you going to come and eat?" It was unusual for Joxer to be late for dinner, even if it was her cooking.

"She's pregnant Xena."

The warrior exhaled. "I know Joxer; she told me."

"If Gabby didn't hate me before she does now." He closed his eyes, hoping to conceal his emotions from Xena. "What am I suppose to do?"

"Talk to her, Joxer. That is the only way any of this is going to get resolved." Xena turned Joxer around. "I know she doesn't want to talk about it, but make her." He nodded, dumbly. "Joxer, she is carrying your baby."

"I know."

Xena placed her hand on his shoulder and squeezed it firmly. "Then go talk to her."

"Now?" Joxer whined.

"Yes, now." Xena gave him a push. He looked at her as if he was a lamb going to the slaughter. Xena motioned him to go forward and he frowned. She could not help but be sympathetic to Joxer because he looked so dishearten.

Joxer took a deep breath as he came upon camp. Gabrielle was poking the fire with a long stick, with a sad expression. He made a fist and stepped forward, hoping there would be no confrontation. The Amazon looked up suddenly, hands on her sais, ready to strike. She saw it was Joxer and went back to poking the fire without greeting him.

"Gabby we have to talk."

"No, we don't."

"Yes, we do." Joxer did not sit. "I've been thinking a lot about what happened, and you know I'm sorry. I mean come on if I was going to have sex with you I would've at least wanted to do it sober so I could remember it.." Gabrielle stood up instantly and hit him on the head with the stick. "Owww."

"That's not funny, Joxer." She threw the stick into the fire and marched out of camp.

"I was kidding Gabby," He whined following her. "You can't avoid me forever."

"Oh yes I can."

"Gabrielle, wait." Joxer ran in front of her. "We really have to talk." She glared at him, anger boiling within her and she lashed out with her fist. Joxer caught it and smiled.

"I'm getting bett..." He was unable to finish his statement for the Amazon punched him in the stomach. Joxer whined and toppled over.

"I'm warning you, Joxer." She told him and walked past him. Joxer managed to catch his breath then went after her.

"Running away from me is not going to fix anything." He told Gabrielle.. "Just hear me out." Realizing that Joxer would never stop bothering her until she listened to him she turned around.

"What?"

"I know you aren't happy about the whole situation but I was thinking." His voice was soft and gentle as he spoke. "I know how you like fighting with Xena and you don't want to give that up, right?" Joxer did not give her an opportunity to answer. "So this is my idea. After you have the baby I'll take it and raise it and you can go back with Xena."

"What?"

"Yeah, you know, I'll find some village and settle down."

"I don't know Joxer."

"It will work out great, honest it will." He smiled but she did not return the smile nor his enthusiasm. Joxer steeped back. "I promise to take care of the baby and," his voice became strained, "you won't ever see me again. Just think about it."

Gabrielle did not know how to answer. "OK." Was all she was able to get out. He forced a smile onto his face, but as she walked away his smile faded. The thought of never seeing her again was an unimaginable pain; however if he at least had their child the suffering may not be as arduous, or so Joxer hoped.

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