Rated: PG - some suggested kissing and stuff, but nothing too serious.
Genre: Oh gee... I'm not sure... I guess it's sort of a light romance?
Spoilers: C'mon... the show's over! Do I really have to mention spoilers? There aren't any anyway.
Author's Notes: Susan sent the lyrics, and I was hard put to come up with a decent story for them. I hope I did an okay job. Anyway... feel free to archive this wherever, but just give me a heads up as to where you want to put it, just so as I know where it is and all. ;) Anyway... enjoy! :D

The tall slender man watched the strawberry blonde woman as she went about setting up camp. She laughed and joked with her raven-haired female companion, seemingly ignoring him. Sighing, he got to his feet and began walking away.

"Hey, where are you going, Joxer?" the dark-haired woman asked.

"Oh, just, uh, going to use the, er, little boys' bush," he lied.

Xena nodded, knowingly. It was all too obvious to everyone, except Gabrielle, that Joxer was head over heels in love with the blonde bard. She watched him leave and turned as she heard the bard approach.

"I suppose he's trying to get out of collecting the firewood, huh?" Gabrielle asked.

"Yeah, he's trying get out of doing something alright," Xena muttered and started to get her bed ready for the night.

"Why can't I just tell her?" he said to himself. "Why can't I just come right out and say, 'Gabrielle, I am so in love with you.'"

A burst of glittering hearts behind him announced the presence of the Goddess of Love. She watched her favorite mortal with a sad smile. She knew full well of the young man's feelings towards Xena's companion. She also knew the bard had no idea how he felt and was afraid to admit her own feelings.

I think it's time for the love goddess to go to work, she thought and disappeared just as quickly as she appeared.

Xena tensed as she heard a branch softly crack. The sudden angry squawking of birds being roused had her instantly on her feet. Her fingers gripped the sword hilt firmly and she motioned for Gabrielle to wait at the camp while she checked out the area. She could barely see the bard nod in the dim light, but knew her companion wasn't foolish enough to follow her in the dark. Her eyes narrowed as she tried to see any movement in the shadows. She caught a slight movement out of the corner of her eye and she was off, moving swiftly but silently among the foliage.

Aphrodite grinned and allowed herself a quiet squeal of triumph before turning to the bard. Waving her hand, she appeared in front of the startled woman in a sparkling shower of red hearts.

"Aphrodite! What are you doing here?" Gabrielle asked.

"Hi, girlfriend, whassup?" Aphrodite grinned, playing with a stray lock of golden hair.

"I'm not sure, but Xena's checking it out," the bard answered.

The goddess pursed her lips. "That's not what I meant! Duh! Goddess of love here! What's happening in your love life?"

Gabrielle rolled her eyes. "Oh, right. Since when do you care about my love life?"

Aphrodite looked shocked. "Of course I care! Now, spill!" she ordered with a gleam in her eye.

Gabrielle shrugged and decided to humour the scantily dressed goddess. "Okay, well, there was a cute guy yester..." she began.

"Nope, not him," Aphrodite waved her hand dismissively.

Gabrielle raised an eyebrow curiously. "How about the guy in the tavern who..."

The goddess shook her head. "Not him either!"

The bard thought about it for a moment and opened her mouth to speak again, but before she could utter a syllable, Aphrodite cut in.

"What about Joxer?" the goddess asked.

Gabrielle's jaw dropped open. "You can't be serious! Joxer? We're talking about the same Joxer right? The clumsy..." The look on the goddess' face stopped her. "Oh, come on, Aphrodite! He doesn't want me! Besides, he could have any girl he wanted at Meg's."

Aphrodite took the bard's hand and led her to a small pool of water. Waving her hand over it, an image of Joxer appeared, his face streaked with tears.Ê Gabrielle looked at the goddess quizzically, but she pointed to the image. "Just watch."

The warrior wannabe roughly wiped at the tears on his face in frustration. He sat down on a log and pulled out a small piece of parchment he kept in his pocket. It was tattered and stained, but Joxer smoothed it out gently and read the words he had written long ago.

"Gabby, I gave my heart to you so foolishly, but what was I to do? Helplessly... hopelessly... I am so in love with you!"Ê He stopped reading and sighing, replaced the paper in his pocket. "Damn it! Why did you pretend to care? It's so easy for you to say goodbye, but I'm going to love you until I die!"

Crumpling, he buried his face in his hands and his shoulders shook as he quietly sobbed.

The image faded and Gabrielle turned in frustration to the goddess of love. "Was that real? Was that really Joxer? Or is this another of your little games?" She demanded.

The bushes behind the bard parted and she turned to see Xena returning with a frustrated look on her face. Glancing over her shoulder, she noticed the goddess was no longer there.

"I was certain there was something there!" the warrior princess grumbled.

"Aphrodite was here," Gabrielle said.

Xena shook her head. "No, I know it wasn't a god. I'd know if it was. I guess it might have been nothing..."

"No, Xena, she was here!"

"Really, what did she say?" Xena asked, her attention finally on the bard.

Gabrielle paused for a moment. She didn't want to lie to her best friend, but she didn't feel comfortable about telling her what happened. "Nothing.... We just talked about Jo... uh... some guys," she lied.

Xena shrugged and lay down on her bedding. "Wonder what's taking Joxer so long," she commented, then rolled over and yawned. "I'm sure he's okay... 'Night Gabrielle."

At that moment, the bushes parted again and Joxer silently returned to the camp. The bard silently watched him settle down to bed. He didn't look at her, but she could see his eyes were red from crying.Ê She wanted to reach out to him... to comfort him, but wasn't sure how to approach him. She reached out her hand, but then shook her head and withdrew it. She lay down between Xena and Joxer and closed her eyes, deciding to try to get some sleep.

Aphrodite waved her hands and a light sprinkling of sparkling golden dust settled around the bard, putting her into a deep sleep.

"Hopelessly... helplessly, I am so in love with you! Gabrielle! I love you!"

She could hear a man calling out to her, but had no idea who it was. She looked around and saw a tall, handsome man calling to her with his arms outstretched and a gentle smile on his face. Her face broke into a smile in return and she walked towards him. Her delicate white dress rippled as she moved and she found herself laughing. Then she began to run and laughed again as his arms swept her off her feet. He gently put her down and bending down, kissed her softly on her lips.

"Oh, Gabby," he breathed into her ear, and kissed her neck.

"Oh, Joxer," she sighed, and then realized what she had said and pulled away in shock. "Joxer! What are you doing here in my dream? Get out!"

"Your dream? This is my dream!" he responded.

Before they could continue, a sparkling light appeared in between them.

"Geez! You two even argue in your dreams!" The goddess of love exclaimed. "I created this whole dream world and brought you two here so you'll both realize how much you love each other!"

Joxer began to protest and Gabrielle laughed scornfully.

The goddess simply crossed her arms and gave them a look.

The bard sighed. "Okay, I guess I do care for him... a little," she admitted grudgingly.

Joxer looked at her surprised and happy. "You... you mean it?" he asked.

The bard smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. Reaching up, she closed her eyes and pursed her lips.Ê Joxer bent down, and she could feel his warm, soft breath on her face... it smelled slightly sweet... like...

"Joxer, why does your breath smell like ... a horse?" Gabrielle mumbled sleepily.

Xena watched her friend with amusement and a smile touched her face. The bard and the wannabe warrior were snuggled in each other's arms as Argo grazed by Gabrielle's head. The palomino snorted and the noise startled the bard awake.

"Wha... ACK!" she cried as she realized whom she was sleeping with. Shoving a still very sleepy Joxer away, she struggled to her feet and stumbled backwards into Xena. She turned to glare at her friend. "Why didn't you wake me?"

Xena raised an eyebrow and smirked. "But you looked so comfortable! I didn't want to disturb you," she teased.

Joxer slowly stood up and shook his head. "Woah! What a dream! I think that field went on forever!"

Gabrielle rolled her eyes. "Tell me about it! Wait a minute! There was a field in your dream?"

Joxer nodded. "You were there too. In a really pretty white tunic."

Gabrielle looked shaken. "And Aphrodite was there too? And we talked about ... uh..."

Joxer nodded and then realized what she was trying to say. "Don't worry. I know it was just a dream," he leaned forward and whispered, and glanced at Xena, who was studiously trying to ignore them.

Gabrielle laughed in relief. "Yes! Of course it was! I mean, you don't..."

"And you would never..." he added.

"Never," she agreed.

Xena glanced at them and pulled some bread and cheese out of her pack. "Breakfast anyone?"

Joxer and Gabrielle joined their friend for breakfast. The events of the past night put out of their minds as they readied themselves for another day of adventuring.

Please take the time to write to Anne at JoxerBuddy@hotmail.com, and let her know how you liked the story!

COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER:
Xena: Warrior Princess, Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, Aphrodite, and all characters who have appeared in the series, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of StudiosUSA and Renaissance Pictures. The lyrics to "Helplessly, Hopelessly" are owned by the appropriate copyright holders. No infringement of copyrights or trademarks is intended in the writing of this fan fiction. This story is copyright © 2002 by Anne Beaudry and is her sole property along with the story idea. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.